Alike mighty and full-grown stood Love and Liberty within him, side by
side. They were bound together and reconciled only by a new resolution
to be gentle, not merely strong, to lay before her with all frankness
his right of freedom and his loving soul, and to be to her the noble
character which belonged to her. "Am I not such, if I really will it?"
said he.
In the highest joy of life, in perfect oneness with himself and
destiny, he made his journey to Isola Bella as rapidly as if he were
going to find there a beloved, instead of merely awaiting one. How many
a thing seemed now smaller along his road, to which he applied the
Roman measure, and not the German, and before which he now, as his
father had foretold him, passed along flying!
At last he saw the artificial Alp of Isola Bella standing in the waves,
and disembarked joyfully with his teacher, Dian, in the garden of
childhood, where he was to expect so much, and, with fresh Italian
life-blossoms on his heart, bid farewell to the land of promise.
He waited several long days, yearning and anxious for his two friends,
although his sunny companion was always reminding him to make allowance
for the rapidity of his own journey. His determination to be gentle
grew continually more and more unnecessary and involuntary. The very
island itself, with its springs born of perfumes and with the distant
garland of Alps, melted his soul. In the former year he had seen it
more in leaves than in blossoms. It was, indeed, his land of childhood.
From many places on the lake stars glimmered up to him out of a deep,
early, after-midnight hour of life. Here had he for the first time
found his father, and for the first time seen Linda's form across the
waters; here he finds and loses them again, after the longest
separation, for a still longer one; and here he stands in the gateway
between north and south. The free, fragrant land, full of islands, the
Jacob's-ladder of his life mounts back into the ether, and he goes down
into a cold region full of constraint and eyewitnesses; his love is
judged by his father, it is assailed by the downfallen friend. "Ye days
in Ischia," he sighed, "ye hours in Vesuvius and in Tivoli, can you
reverse your course? can you ever come back again and overflow anew the
insatiable heart, that it may drink, and say, 'It is enough'?"
To his Dian, as if by way of justifying himself and his illimitable
longing, he spoke frequently of Chariton and their children, and asked
him how it was with his heart when he thought of them. "Don't talk to
me so much of them," said he, after his manner, feeling more than he
suspected or betrayed, "we are still so cruelly far off from them; one
only spoils one's journey without cause. But when I have them all....
Well, ah God!" Then he paused, snatched the youth to his arms, and did
not kiss him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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