Tokyo to Tijuana: Gabriele Departing AmericaSills, Steven David Justin
General
Tokyo to Tijuana: Gabriele Departing America
Sills, Steven David Justin
Fiction
The book is of 20th century American art and
contains a few examples of his mother's work. Only pleasures from pictures have
had some vague calling or tugging; but then it has been pictures that have
composed so much of his existence.
He had detoured from the interstate and came into the town to buy a sandwich
and cola at a convenience store, which fostered the purchase of the newest
issues of Playboy and Hustler as well. He is downtown because the heavy
diluting of rain in this small town necessitated him to pull over to the side
of the road and park his car. He is in the library because it was a two-block
run from where he parked his car. The continual pounding of rain caused him to
have to go to the bathroom sooner than what he would have done otherwise, for
he is in all respects a follower of nature's suggestions. The bathroom was his
impetus for entering the library. In the process of staring up at the fan to
focus a second of hate toward it he sees a woman straightening her body after
rising off the seat. She is at a table around 50 feet from that of his own. Her
table is near a small wall of books. He regrets that he has not seen her legs
slide on the shiny wood of the chair or her thighs rising up to him although
imagined action can be continually repeated and he continually repeats it.
Bound in black stockings, the legs go to the front desk where some hands scan
titles of her videos.
"It seems nobody checks out books any longer. We've had to restrict the kids
use of the internet upstairs. They'll do nothing but chat the whole day if
nobody catches them and then before they leave they check out videos to take
back home."
"Well, guess I should feel honored to be thought of as a kid when I'm nearly
42. I am really in a hurry so could you please…"
"All right."
For a minute if not longer there is a momentary lapse in the present before he
becomes conscious of it again. Fueled on adrenalin and hunger, he finds himself
walking behind her in the rain. He imagines himself catching up and offering
his umbrella to her but she has one of her own and so he timidly tracks her
from a distance. He imagines her dropping the keys to her car but the fates
also do not allow him this prop. He sees her get in but imagines her already
seated with the door shut but unable to start the car. This does not happen
either. He is unable to monitor himself. Like a child he distances himself from
his actions. He is feeling the movements of someone else's body. Will has been
frozen in time. There is a cold frozen constancy in his consciousness of the
present moment. He finds himself knocking on the window. She rolls it down. He
does not know what to say. She hasn't dropped one of her videos in the rain. He
is as if naked and without a gift or prop with which to make a confidence. He
stares at her mature beauty.
"Yes?" she asks.
"Looks like the air in one of your tires is low-this one on the driver's side."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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