Tokyo to Tijuana: Gabriele Departing AmericaSills, Steven David Justin
General
Tokyo to Tijuana: Gabriele Departing America
Sills, Steven David Justin
Fiction
"Him too," she sighed. "And my friendliness with you." It was often a stretch
to even say "friendliness" in association to the Rita/Lily person but she did
not know what else to call their association. "Well, if I am a happy
solipsistic person I might well believe in God and appreciate my dizzying
blessings but in doing this I'd be guilty of saying that this god cared about
me but didn't care for those he allowed to starve or be eaten by a cannibal or
forced into a predicament of having to jump out of a burning building-whatever.
I suppose he could care about some of us and not others, but wouldn't that
lower him to human levels? If I really believed in God, then this is the only
god there is; and yet to be such a god it is quite obvious that he or she is no
different than you or me…and I don't know about you, but I certainly can't
create the Earth and the universe no matter how hard I try, and believe me I
try." The baby began to scream. It pierced all the air of the bus. "I'll be
lucky if I make it to 90 and don't have to wear diapers. There is a chance he,
she, or it exists as a being that is not sympathetic about me or anyone else.
If he is this, he is so large and so eternal, with no sense of human time, that
a human life and its brief series of short-lived motions on one obscure planet
would be inconsequential. If so, he doesn't think about me any more than you
think about that last second you picked your nose. Yes, I'm watching." The
Rita/Lily giggled manically despite her depression. "Also, he isn't one I can
grasp so there isn't much sense in considering him. I'm just a fire ant
stinging anything that threatens me, cognizant of nothing least of all the man
that is there to squash me because of my sting. An ant might know about being
threatened but he knows nothing about the being that threatens him. So it is
with us and such a God." She could tell that the Rita/Lily person was not
understanding much of the conversation but her eyes seemed to register that she
was in a godless universe for fear had dilated her pupils.
Gabriele thought about this subject or quasi-subject of philosophy. She wasn't
even a philosopher and yet in a minute and a half she had formulated a treatise
and had proven it as much as was possible. She hadn't exactly proven that there
wasn't a god. She assumed that would take an additional three minutes. But she
had proven that it was not a worthwhile pursuit for humans to undertake.
Smoking marijuana from morning until wee hours of the night seemed a more
constructive use of one's faculties. She wondered how it was that Socrates
could lose himself for hours in a question that perplexed him when really all
he needed was just a few minutes.
"What did you eat today, Rita?"
"Lily."
"Whatever."
"I ate well."
"What?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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