Amongst other distractions which Tom tried at this crisis of his
life, was reading. For three or four days running, he really
worked hard--very hard, if we were to reckon by the number of
hours he spent in his own rooms over his books with his oak
sported--hard, even though we should only reckon by results. For,
though scarcely an hour passed that he was not balancing on the
hind legs of his chair with a vacant look in his eyes, and
thinking of anything but Greek roots or Latin constructions, yet
on the whole he managed to get through a good deal, and one
evening, for the first time since his quarrel with Hardy, felt a
sensation of real comfort--it hardly amounted to pleasure--as he
closed his Sophocles some hour or so after hall, having just
finished the last of the Greek plays which he meant to take in
for his first examination. He leaned back in his chair and sat
for a few minutes, letting his thoughts follow their own bent.
They soon took to going wrong, and he jumped up in fear lest he
should be drifting back into the black stormy sea, in the trough
of which he had been laboring so lately, and which he felt he was
by no means clear of yet. At first he caught up his cap and gown
as though he were going out. There was a wine party at one of his
acquaintance's rooms; or he could go and smoke a cigar in the
pool room, or at any one of a dozen other places. On second
thoughts, however, he threw his academicals back on to the sofa
and went to his book-case. The reading had paid so well that
evening that he resolved to go on with it. He had no particular
object in selecting one book more than another, and so took down
carelessly the first that came to hand.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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