"'Sarah, owing to this unprincipled conduct, has been suspended for a month, and the club hereby hopes some day not far off to see him sus--' no, that's wrong--I mean--" "Hung," suggested Trimble, in an audible whisper. "Order--turn him out for saying hung, instead of hanged," said the president. "Shut up, can't you?" said the secretary, "can't you let me finish the sentence? '--See him sus--susceptible of better emotions.'" "Hear, hear," said the club, breathing again to see the corner turned. "I hope that's not all," said my mother. "That's as far as we've got; but we'll let him down easy in the next," said Langrish. "The next will have the account of the Sports, I suppose," said my mother. "If our men win," said Warminster. "We're bound to win the High Jump if Langrish keeps on his form; he did 4 feet 1 and a half inches this afternoon." "You needn't talk--you're all right for the 100 Yards," said the modest Langrish; "there's no one in, except young Brown of the day cads, who can touch you; and he's sure to go a mucker on the day." "Don't be too sure of that," said I. "Dicky Brown doesn't go muckers if he can help it." "There you are--backing the town cads now. I move, and Mrs Jones seconds, that Sarah be, and is hereby, kic--I mean sat upon by the club." "Oh, don't, please," said my mother, "the bed is not strong enough." "All right--it's lucky for Sarah. If you were half a chap you'd see we didn't lose the Quarter-mile. Rackstraw will have a look in at it, but it'll puzzle him to beat Flitwick. Walsh is going to cut out for him. So we may just do it; but it'll be a go--eh, paupers?" Rackstraw and Walsh both protested there would be no difficulty about it if only the track was in good order, and their wind held out, and Flitwick muddled his start, and finished a yard or two behind. We were all prepared to stake the glory of Sharpe's on these trifling conditions. Presently the preparation bell began to toll, and the party broke up with a cordiality and cheerfulness which contrasted strangely with the solemnity with which it had begun. My mother was politely requested to become an honorary member of the club, and as politely consented, expressing a hope that she might meet with its honourable members many times again. When they had gone she told me how much she had enjoyed the evening, and how she liked every one of them, and hoped they wouldn't think her rude to have laughed now and then, but really, she said, not being used to it, she could not help it.