Paul had lately lost much of his former vivacity; he sometimes had no
power to rouse himself and conquer his depression, and would sink into
a revery, from which he awakened only when he observed Hilda regarding
him with a look of trouble on her lovely face. Then perhaps for a while
he would be as merry as ever, although this would not last long. He
would leave the rest, lagging behind upon some side-path if they were
walking, or absenting himself upon some slight pretext from the party
on the balcony.
After a month of hard struggle Paul at last confronted a crisis in his
fate. The goal which he lived to attain was reached. Between Leo and
Eva there was now only the promise given by the latter to Bertram. The
heart of each was laid bare to the other. It was in Paul's power to
remove the obstacle that separated the lovers. Why did he hesitate to
pronounce the word that would avail to do so? He excused this to
himself by urging that he must first keep the promise given to Leo,
whereby he was pledged to learn all that could be known of his past
from Dr. Putzer. He did not confess even to himself that he dreaded
keeping this promise; that he shuddered when he received from Dr.
Atzinger, who was in constant attendance upon the sick man, daily
intelligence of the slow improvement in his patient's condition; that
his heart had throbbed fast when he heard that Putzer would soon be in
complete possession of his faculties and able to receive Delmar's
visit; and that on this very morning, as he sat silent at the
breakfast-table, he was lost in gloomy reflection because Dr. Atzinger
had reported on the previous day that he hoped on the ensuing morning
to allow Delmar the long-talked-of interview with the sick man.
This visit Delmar was now anticipating with harrowing anxiety. In the
sleepless night he had passed he had reviewed in detail every
circumstance of the last few weeks. Four weeks since death would have
been welcome to him, in view of the horrible certainty that Hilda was
legally his sister, although bound to him by no natural tie; all that
had given life an interest to him then had been the hope of insuring
his friend's happiness; he thought this hope now upon the point of
fulfilment, and yet a possible death seemed to him far from welcome
now.
What had produced this change in the last month? Was his conviction
that Hilda was legally his half-sister shaken? No, on the contrary it
had been confirmed; after his conversation with Leo he had written to a
prominent lawyer in K----, instructing him to make every possible
inquiry as to Herr Delmar's place of abode and family circumstances
before he had come to reside in K----; placing at his disposal the
means for making these investigations thorough at any cost. The result
had been such as to remove all doubt in Paul's mind, had any such
existed, as to his relationship with Hilda.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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