"Well, that ain't surprisin', is it, Piddie?" says I. "You don't suppose we can talk over big affairs like ours out here, do you? Keep your ear off the keyhole, too!" And with that I goes in chipper and cheerful. The minute I gets through the last door, though, I feels the frost in the air. Mr. Ellins, he lets me wait long enough for the chill to strike in, while he signs a basketful of letters. Then he swings around in his swivel chair and proceeds to size me up through them gunmetal gray eyes of his. Say, it was like standin' in front of a searchlight and under a cold shower, all at once. "So, young man!" says he. "You have been hearing me swear, eh?" That's enough for me. Just from that I can sketch the whole plot. And it don't take me a month to figure out the line of talk I'm goin' to use. What's the sense in playin' for time when your blue ticket's all made out. "Heard you?" says I. "Think I wear my ears full of putty?" "Huh!" he grunts. "And do I understand that you disapprove of my profanity?" "Ah, who's been fillin' you up?" says I. "Why, you're an artist at it." "Thanks," says he. "And I suppose you felt it your duty to inform my relatives of the fact? Very thoughtful of you, I'm sure." "Don't mention it," says I. "You--you're an impertinent young whelp!" says he, his cheeks gettin' purple and puffy. "Ah, don't mind the frills," says I. "Get out the can. I'm fired, ain't I?" "No!" he shouts, bangin' his fist down on the desk. "At least, not until I get through with you. What I want to know is why in blue belted blazes you did it!" "Well," says I, "first off I guess it just naturally slipped out; then, when I saw what a hit I was makin' with Martha--why, I expect I sort of enjoyed givin' her the details." Somehow, that seems to graze his funnybone, and he has a struggle to keep a grin out of his mouth corners. "Humph!" says he. "I--I'd like to have seen her then. So you went on to describe the general state of my health, did you?" "It was you we was chattin' about," says I. "Fascinating topic, I've no doubt," he growls; "but I hardly appreciate the attention. Understand?" "That's breakin' on me gradual," says I. "Fortunately for you, though," he goes on, "you didn't attempt to lie out of it. By the way, why didn't you?" "And her just after givin' you the whole game over the 'phone?" says I. "Ah, say!" "Young man," says he, shootin' over the quizzin' gaze, "either you are too blickety blinked fresh to keep, or else you're too keen to lose; hanged if I know which! But--er--well, I'll take a chance. You may go out and report to Mr. Piddie for duty." "It'll near break his heart," says I. It does, too. I expect from what he'd heard in the private office that he was figurin' on handin' me my hat as I was shot out and remarkin' that he knew all along it was comin' to me. Then there'd be a rollcall of new office boys, with him pickin' out one more to his taste than me. But no such luck for him.