Humorous stories; New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Private secretaries -- Fiction
Uncle Kyrle nods. "In a field hospital, under fire," says he, "late last
September. That's all we know. Where do you think, though, I ran across
that boy of hers? Found him at Zenobia's; found them both rather, at a
theater. Sheer luck. For if you'll pardon my saying it, that youth is a
nephew I'm going to be proud of some of these days unless I am----"
Say, this was gettin' a little too personal for me. I'd been shiftin'
around uneasy for a minute or two, and about then I decided it wouldn't
be polite to listen any longer. So I make a dash out the side door into
the hall, not knowin' just what to do or where to go. And I bumps into
Selma wheelin' in the tea wagon. That gives me a hunch.
"Say, Bright Eyes," says I, pushin' a dollar at her, "take this and
ditch that tea stuff for a minute, can't you? Harken! There's goin' to
be a new arrival at the front door in about a minute, and you must
answer the bell. No, don't indulge in that open-face movement. Just
watch me close!"
With that I clips past the drawin'-room entrance, opens the front door
gentle, and gives the button a good long push. Then I slides back and
digs up a card case that Aunt Zenobia has presented me with only a
couple of days ago.
"Here!" says I. "Get out your plate and pass one of these to the Missus.
That's it. Push it right on her conspicuous. Now! On your way!"
She's real quick at startin', Selma is, when she's shoved brisk from
behind. And as she goes through the doorway I stretches my ear to hear
what Aunty will say to the new arrival. And, believe me, if I'd given
her the lines myself, she couldn't have done it better!
"Mr. Richard Taber Ballard?" says she, readin' the card. Then she turns
to Uncle Kyrle. "Why, this must be some----"
"Eh?" says he. "Did you hear that, Zenobia? Torchy, you young rascal,
come in here and explain yourself!"
"Torchy!" gasps Aunty. "Did--did you say--Torchy?"
"Anybody callin' for me?" says I, steppin' into the room with a grin on.
And to watch that stary look settle in Aunty's eyes, and see the purple
tint spread back to her ears, was worth standin' for all the rough deals
I'd ever had from her. At last I had her bumpin' the bumps! Sort of
dazed she inspects the card once more, and then glances at me. Do you
wonder? Richard Taber Ballard! I ain't got used to it myself.
"Here he is," says Uncle Kyrle jovial, draggin' me to the front, "that
scamp nephew I was telling you about. The Richard is for his father, you
know; the Taber he gets from his mother--also his red hair. Eh,
Torchy? And this, young man, is Miss Verona."
He swings me around facin' her, and I expect I must have acted some
sheepish. But trust Vee! What does she do but let loose one of them
ripply laughs of hers. Then she steps up, pulls my head down playful
with both hands, and looks me square in the eyes.
"Why didn't you tell me before, Torchy," says she, "that you had such a
perfectly grand name as all that?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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