“Mam war ridin’ slowly along, thinkin’ how sorry she was, cos Chary
Dolin, who always led her off, had sich a bad cold, an’ wouldn’t be able
to ’sist her singin’ to-day. She war practisin’ the hymns, and had got
as far whar it says, ‘I have a race to run,’ when the passun huv in
sight, an’ in ’bout the dodgin’ of a diedapper, she found thar war truth
in the words, for the colt, hearin’ the hoss cumin’ up behind, began to
show symptoms of runnin’; but when he heard the passun holler, ‘wo wo!’
to his horse, he thought it war me shoutin’ ‘go!’ and sure ’nuff off
they started jis as the passun got up even; so it war a fair race.
Whoop! git out, but it war egsitin’—the dust flew, and the rail-fence
appeered strate as a rifle. Thar war the passun, his legs fast to the
critter’s flanx, arms lockt round his neck, face as pale as a rabbit’s
belly, and the white flag streemin’ far behind—and thar war Mam, fust
on one side, then on t’other, her new caliker swelled up round her like
a bear with the dropsy, the old lady so much surprized she cuddent ride
steddy, an’ tryin’ to stop her colt, but he war too well trained to stop
while he heard ‘go!’
“Mam got ’sited at last, and her eyes ’gan to glimmer like she seen her
daddy’s ghost axin’ ‘if he ever trained up a child or a race-hoss to be
’fraid of a small brush on a Sunday,’ she commenced ridin’ beautiful;
she braced herself up in the saddle, and began to make calkerlations how
she war to win the race, for it war nose and nose, and she saw the
passun spurrin’ his critter every jump. She tuk off her shoe, and the
way a number ten go-to-meetin’ brogan commenced givin’ a hoss particular
Moses, were a caution to hoss-flesh—but still it kept nose and nose.
She found she war carryin’ too much weight for Colt, so she ’gan to
throw off plunder, till nuthin’ was left but her saddle and close, and
the spurs kept tellin’ still. The old woman commenced strippin’ to
lighten till it wouldn’t bin the clean thing for her to have taken off
one dud more; an’ then when she found it war no use while the spurs
lasted, she got cantankerous.
“‘Passun,’ said she, ‘I’ll be cust if it’s fair or gentlemanly for you,
a preacher of the gospel, to take advantage of an old woman this way,
usin’ spurs when you know _she_ can’t wear ’em—’taint Christian-like
nuther,’ and she bust into cryin’.
“‘Wo! Miss Hibbs! Wo! Stop! Madam! Wo! Your son!’ he attempted to say,
when the old woman tuck him on the back of the head, and fillin’ his
mouth with right smart of a saddle-horn, and stoppin’ the talk, as far
as his share went for the present.
“By this time they’d got nigh on to the meetin’-house, and the folks
were harkin’ away on ‘Old Hundred,’ and wonderin’ what could have become
of the passun and Mam Hibbs. One sister in a long beard axt another
brethren in church, if she’d heerd anything ’bout that New York preecher
runnin’ way with a woman old enough to be his muther. The brethrens gin
a long sigh an’ groaned:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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