"If it was anyone else," and he fetched a deep sigh, with tears standing in his eyes, leaving the sentence incomplete. At that moment I was impelled almost to cast myself at his feet, to confess, and beg forgiveness.... "I want to warn you," he went on, "of Hildreth ... once before this has happened ... she is a varietist by nature, as I am essentially a monogamist." "--and the free love idea, it was you who taught her this, brought her into contact with Havelock Ellis, Ellen Key, Rosa Von Mayerreder?" "I deny that. I believe in human freedom ... divorce ... remarriage ... but not in extreme sex-radicalism ... Hildreth has misinterpreted me ... the people you mention are great idealists, but in many ways they go too far ... true--I brought Hildreth into contact with these books; but only that she might use her own judgment, not accept them wholly and blindly, as she has done...." I looked at the man. He was sincere. An incredible, naive, almost idiotic purity shone in his face.... Again I was impelled to confess. Again I held my tongue. Again I lied. "Penton, what you have just said about you and Hildreth and your lives together, I shall consider as sacred between us." He gave me his hand. "Promise me one thing, that you will not take Hildreth as your sweetheart ... be true to our friendship first, Johnnie." "Penton, I am only flesh and blood; I will promise, if anything happens, to tell you, ultimately, the truth." He looked at me with close scrutiny again, at this ambiguous speech. "Johnnie, _have_ you told me the absolute truth?" "Yes!" evading his eyes. "--because there is a wild strain in Hildreth that only needs a little rousing--" He paused. * * * * * "Johnnie," as we walked away, "don't you think you had better pack up and leave? _The next time_ I am going to sue for a divorce." * * * * * We walked home arm in arm. I simulated so well that it was Baxter who begged pardon for even suspecting me. But I felt like a dog. I, for my part, determined to bid farewell to Hildreth that very evening, before she retired for the night, in her cottage--take train to New York, and so to Paris, without first finishing my _Judas_, as I had intended. We would bury forever in the secret places of our hearts what had already happened between us ... this was my first impulse.... My next was--that we should up and run away together, and defy Penton Baxter and the world. * * * * * Hildreth could see by the strangeness in my behaviour, as I came into the cottage, to kiss her good-night ... and stay a little while--a new custom of ours, as we grew bolder--could see that I had something on my mind. I related to her all that had taken place between me and Penton that morning....