It is singular to observe how lightly the marks of Time occasionally
pass over the human form and face. An instance of this might be seen in
Mrs. Chattaway. It was strange that it should be so in her case. Her
health was not good, and she certainly was not a happy woman. Illness
was frequently her portion; care ever seemed to follow her; and it is
upon these sufferers in mind and body that Time is fond of leaving his
traces. He had not left them on Mrs. Chattaway; her face was fair and
fresh as it had been eight years ago; her hair fell in its mass of
curls; her eyes were still blue, and clear, and bright.
And yet anxiety was her constant companion. It may be said that remorse
never left her. She would sit at the window of her room
upstairs--Madam's room--for hours, apparently contemplating the outer
world; in reality seeing nothing.
As she was sitting now. The glories of the bright day had faded into
twilight; the sun no longer lit up the many hues of the autumn foliage;
all the familiar points in the landscape had faded to indistinctness;
old Canham's lodge chimneys were becoming obscure, and the red light
from the mines and works was beginning to show out on the right in the
extreme distance. Mrs. Chattaway leaned her elbow on the old-fashioned
armchair, and rested her cheek upon her hand. Had you looked at her
eyes, gazing out so upon the fading landscape, you might have seen that
they were deep in the world of thought.
That constitutional timidity of hers had been nothing but a blight to
her throughout life. Reticence in a woman is good; but not that timid,
shrinking reticence which is the result of fear; which dare not speak up
for itself, even to oppose a wrong. Every wrong inflicted upon Rupert
Trevlyn--every unkindness shown him--every pang, whether of mind or
body, which happier circumstances might have spared him, was avenged
over and over again in the person of Mrs. Chattaway. It may be said that
she lived only in pain; her life was one never-ending sorrow--sorrow for
Rupert.
In the old days, when her husband had chosen to deceive Squire Trevlyn
as to the existence of Rupert, she had not dared to avow the truth, and
say to her father, "There is an heir born." She dared not fly in the
face of her husband, and say it; and, it may be, that she was too
willingly silent for her husband's sake. It would seem strange, but that
we know what fantastic tricks our passions play us, that pretty, gentle
Edith Trevlyn should have _loved_ that essentially disagreeable man,
James Chattaway. But so it was. And, while deploring the fact of the
wrong dealt out to Rupert--it may almost be said _expiating_ it--Mrs.
Chattaway never visited that wrong upon her husband, even in thought, as
it ought to have been visited. None could realise more intensely its
consequences than she realised them in her secret heart. Expiate it? Ay,
she expiated it again and again, if her sufferings could only have been
reckoned as atonement.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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