"Oh, tidy be ----! Cuss your nice old lady, and her good conversation, and all the ---- well-bred kids. I'll be cussed if you'll ever come any such smart tricks on me again. The best will be none too good for me, hereafter. I thought all the while that you were feeling mighty gay for a man living on wind and water, and sleeping on a bunch of straw. And I suppose, if the truth were known, you slipped off up to some hotel every night after I got to sleep, and staid till five o'clock in the morning, and then returned in time to make a ---- fool of me. But look out for breakers hereafter. No more clean, nice, tidy boarding-houses for me, no matter how home-like it is, nor how good a talker the old woman is. I am through--through forever, even though all the well-bred children in Missouri starve for the want of income from boarders, I am going to move to-day." We then moved to a respectable hotel, where both were delighted with the wonderful change. After leaving Kansas City we remained together for some time, but Johnny made no improvement in his manner of living till finally his money was gone and his stock was reduced to a mere handful of goods. At last one Saturday afternoon we went out to make a sale and I cleaned out the last dollars' worth and then sold the trunks and declared the business defunct. Johnny protested, but I argued with him that the sooner he sold out entirely and spent the money the sooner he could call on his wife for more. He said that was so, and he guessed he would telegraph her to sell another house and lot and send him the proceeds immediately, with which he would purchase more goods. I laughed at the idea and little thought he would do so till about two weeks later he opened a letter one day containing a draft for several hundred dollars, and said: "Johnston there is nothing like striking it rich;" and then queried in an under tone: "If a man has nothing and his wife has plenty who does the property belong to?" He liked the auction business and immediately ordered more goods and also began showing more extravagance than ever in buying clothing and a disposition to go out with "the boys" at every town we visited. I kept "hus'ling" with my polish and let Johnny pay my hotel bills and the commission due me on auction sales. I soon saw that all arguments were lost on him so long as his wife owned another house and lot, so concluded to stay with him as long as there was anything in it. He was not long, however, in again bringing the business to a focus. It happened in this way: One afternoon while I was out selling polish he engaged in a quiet game of cards "with just enough at stake to make it interesting," and when the game ended he had not only lost all his ready cash, but had borrowed about twice as much on the goods as they were worth, and had also lost that.