Twenty Years' Recollections of an Irish Police MagistratePorter, Frank Thorpe
History
Twenty Years' Recollections of an Irish Police Magistrate
Porter, Frank Thorpe
Crime -- Ireland; Criminals -- Ireland; Ireland -- Social life and customs; Porter, Frank Thorpe, 1801-1882
In the year 1836, Lord Mulgrave, afterwards Marquis of Normanby, was
Lord Lieutenant of Ireland. He had an aide-de-camp, a Captain B----, who
has since supplemented that name by another commencing with O. That
gentleman then was, and has since continued to be, a most desirable
addition to any social or convivial re-union in which wit and comic
humor were appreciated. On the night of the explosion, Captain B---- was
returning from some festive scene, and reached College Green, on his way
to the Castle, a few minutes after the occurrence. He instantly ordered
his driver to make for Merrion Square as quickly as possible, and to
stop at the residence of Crampton, who was the first surgical
practitioner of the time, and who was very generally considered to have
a most persistent anxiety to establish acquaintance and even intimacies
amongst the aristocracy. Captain B---- applied himself to the knocker
and door-bell until he had completely roused every inmate of the house,
and to the first who enquired the reason for his urgent application, he
replied, "To let Surgeon Crampton know that a very distinguished
personage had fallen from his horse in College Green, and sustained
serious injuries." The hoax was successful. Crampton proceeded with the
utmost haste to the place designated, and subsequently he caused
considerable surprise by becoming the frequent narrator of the trick to
which he had been subjected.
A REJECTED SUITOR.
In offering to my readers an incident or anecdote, I have the advantage
of being free from any necessity for a consecutive arrangement. My
recollections may suggest occurrences anterior to some already narrated
without precluding me from a description of them. About the time,
however, to which I have last adverted, I was residing in Lower
Fitzwilliam Street, and a young lady, a near relative of my wife, was a
frequent visitor. She was decidedly handsome, and possessed other
attractions of no inconsiderable value. Her admirers were numerous, and
amongst them there was no more ardent suitor than a Mr. Richard S----.
He was an accomplished gentleman, of handsome countenance and fine
portly figure. He sang very well, and almost always adapted his voice to
the music of his own guitar. His family was of high respectability in a
southern county, but some banking speculations had seriously diminished
their financial resources. His addresses were most ardently directed,
but the fair lady was not to be won. She was informed that her admirer
supported himself by some employments or agencies in the corn trade. He
was refused, and almost immediately disappeared from Irish society. When
I resigned the police magistracy in 1861, I was invited by my friend,
the late Marcus Costello, to visit him at Gibraltar, at which place he
held the office of Attorney-General. In a few weeks after my arrival
there, he told me that some Spanish officers of high distinction were to
cross from Algesiras, to visit the fortress and see the extraordinary
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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