Lady Etwynde looks at her wistfully. In her own great happiness she
can feel tenfold the sorrowful fate of these sundered lives. "And he
is going to break off his marriage?" she says anxiously.
"Yes," says Lauraine. "He says to go through with it is beyond his
power."
"Poor fellow!" exclaims Lady Etwynde, with involuntary compassion.
She is angry with him, and yet sorry for him, for he has proved so
faithful; and, after all, is any love quite unselfish if it be worth
the name?
"My poor Lauraine!" she murmurs involuntarily. "Your marriage has
indeed been a fatal error; but, as I have said before, there remains
nothing but to make the best of it. The only thing for you and Keith
is separation. All other feelings except that one forbidden one are
a poor pretence. I feared that long ago. I am glad you have been so
brave, and he too. Believe me, hard as duty is, the very effort of
doing it creates strength for further trials. The consciousness of
right is a satisfaction in itself, even when one is misjudged."
Lauraine listens, and the tears stand on her lashes, and roll slowly
down her cheeks.
"My life is very hard," she says bitterly.
"Would it be less hard if you had ceased to respect yourself, if you
had lost the creeds and faiths which still make honour your one
anchor of safety? I think not."
"I can think of nothing now save him and his unhappiness," cries
Lauraine wildly. "I have never loved him as I love him to-day. Oh!
I know it is wrong, shameful to say such a thing; but it is the
truth, and I must speak it--this once. Why, do you know that when he
said good-bye to me I could have flung myself at his feet and said,
'Let the world go by, let sin or misery be my portion for
evermore--only do not you leave me!' It seemed as if nothing in life
was worth anything beside one hour of love! And yet--well, how good
an actress I must be, Etwynde--he called me cold-hearted."
"Thank God he did!" exclaims Lady Etwynde. "Oh, Lauraine, your good
angel must have saved you to-day. I did not think it had come to
this; and I cannot find it in my heart to blame you, for--I love too."
"And my husband taunted me with being no better than other women,
simply because I had never been tempted," continues Lauraine
presently. "Well, perhaps in heart I am not. He may have been
right, and virtue is, after all, only a matter of--temperament."
"Oh, hush! I cannot bear to hear you talk like that," cries Lady
Etwynde. "Does he--does Sir Francis suspect anything?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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