"Lauraine, go to Keith Athelstone; I command you. If there is
time--if you see him alive tell him I bade you go--tell him I ask his
pardon for the wrong I have done him. Go, child; why do you linger
here--every moment is precious. Do you think I am so altogether
selfish that I cannot see how you suffer--cannot feel all you have
done--for me? Go."
"But you," she says hesitatingly; "you need me; you wished me to
stay."
"I am better. I feel stronger," he says, with brave effort. "And
the worst is over; you need not fear for me. I have wronged you
enough. Let me feel I have tried to do one unselfish action--even at
the last."
She looks at his face--at the drawn, sharpened features, the sunken
eyes, the hollow cheeks. A sudden fear and reproach smite her.
"I cannot leave you," she says, with a burst of tears. "We have been
most unhappy, I know, but you are my husband--my child's father."
"And the man for whom you have no love. Child! do not waste time in
folly. At a moment like this we see things as they are--naked, bare,
undisguised. Take my message to him, and comfort him with your
presence. It is the one thing I can do for you both; and I do it
with all my heart. Spare no expense--gold will speed your journey,
and I--I shall wait here till I know--he has forgiven."
Still she hesitates. Still she feels as if she were in some way
wronging the man to whom duty binds her, for sake of the man she
loves. He grows impatient.
"For me the worst is past. I shall do very well now. Are you
scrupulous as to that?--know no fear. You have been obedient in all
things that caused you suffering. Can you not be it for one thing
that you desire? Must I storm--insist?"
"Oh, hush," she says passionately; "it is so hard--if only I knew--
"You do know. I bid you go, and that without an evil thought--you
have but to obey."
Then she leaves him. He listens to the hurried preparations. A
strange, feverish strength seems to have come to him. As he has
said, it is the one really unselfish action he has ever performed in
his life. For though he has bidden her leave him, he is longing for
her presence. He knows his own hours are numbered, despite the hopes
held out. He knows that to have her with him during the dreadful
ordeal through which he has to pass would be the only comfort that
life holds. He shudders as he lies there face to face with death, as
the cold waters of the great river seem to flow on--on--up to his
very feet; and in that awful passage there will be no voice to
whisper comfort, no prayers from that low, sweet woman's voice to
tell of peace, of hope, of the gates of mercy standing open yet, even
to the greatest of sinners. He shudders, and the cold dews of
anguish stand upon his brow. But he is strong still, strong enough
to hide the truth from her. She comes to bid him farewell, and he
looks long and sorrowfully at the fair, sad face. How changed she
is, how changed!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account