Two Sides of the Face: Midwinter TalesQuiller-Couch, Arthur
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Two Sides of the Face: Midwinter Tales
Quiller-Couch, Arthur
Fiction; Short stories, English
And here in Ardevora, of all places!--where the womenkind be that
masterful already, a man must get into his sea-boots before he can call
his soul his own. Why, there was a woman here once that never asked for a
vote in her life, and yet capsized an Election for Parliament--candidates,
voters, and the whole apple-cart--as easy as you might turn over a plate.
Did you ever hear tell of Kitty Lebow and her eight tall daughters?
No; I daresay not. The world's old and losing its memory when it begins
to talk of Woman Suffrage.
This Kitty, or Christian, or Christiana Lebow was by birth a Bottrell: and
a finer family than the Bottrells, by their own account, you wouldn't find
in all England. Not that it matters whether they came over with William
the Norman, nor whether they could once on a time ride from sea to sea on
their own acres. For Kitty was the last to carry the name, and she left
it in Ardevora vestry the day she signed marriage with Paul Lebow (or, as
he wrote it, Lebeau--"b-e-a-u,"): and the property had gone generations
before. As she said 'pon her death-bed, "five-foot-six of church-hay will
hold the only two achers left to me," she being a little body and very
facetious to the last, and meaning her legs, of course.
Now the reason I can't tell you: but the mischief with the Bottrells was
this: That for generation after generation all the spirit of the family
went to the females. The men just dandered away their time and their
money, fell into declines, or had fits and went out like the snuff of a
candle. But the women couldn't be held nor bound, lived to any age they
pleased, and either kept their sweethearts on the hook or married them
and made their lives a burden. Oh, a bean-fed sex, sir, and monstrous
handsome! And Kitty, though little, was as handsome as any, and walked
Ardevora streets with her eight daughters, all tall as grenadiers and
terrible as an army with banners.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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