'Yes, those are the only cases at present. Thank you, I shall be much
obliged if you will attend to them. Little Jessie is a very delicate
child: things may go hardly with her.' Then he stopped, picked another
spray of jasmine, and pulled off the little starry flowers remorselessly.
'Miss Garston, I want to say something: I feel I owe you some sort of
explanation. I wish to tell you that I have only myself to blame. I have
thought it all over, and I have come to the conclusion that it is no
fault of yours that I misunderstood you. It is your nature to be kind.
You did not wish to mislead me.'
'I am not aware that I ever mislead people,' I returned, rather proudly,
for I could not help feeling a little indignant: Mr. Hamilton was
certainly not treating me well.
'No, of course not,' looking excessively pained. 'I know you too well to
accuse you of that. If I misunderstood you, if I imagined things, it was
my own fault,--mine solely. I would not blame you for worlds.'
'I am glad of that, Mr. Hamilton,' in rather an icy tone.
'No, you could not have told me: I ought to have found it out for myself.
Do you mind if I go away now? I do not feel quite myself, and I would
rather talk of this again another time. Perhaps you will tell me all
about it then.' And he actually took up his hat and shook hands with me
again. Somehow his touch made me shiver when I remembered the long
hand-clasp of the previous night,--only ten or eleven hours ago; and yet
this strange change had been worked in him.
I let him go, though it nearly broke my heart to see him look so careworn
and miserable. My woman's pride was up in arms, though for very pity and
love I could have called him back and begged him to tell me in plain
English and without reservation what he meant by his vague words. Once I
rose and went to the door, the latch was in my hand, but I sat down again
and watched him quietly until he was out of sight. I would wait, I said
to myself; I would rather wait until he came to his senses; and then I
laughed a little angrily, though the tears were in my eyes. It was
vexatious, it was bitterly disappointing, it was laying on my shoulders a
fresh burden of responsibility and anxiety. The happiness that a quarter
of an hour ago seemed within my reach had vanished and left me worried
and perplexed. And yet, in spite of the pain Mr. Hamilton had inflicted,
I did not for one moment lose hope or courage.
Something had gone wrong, that was evident. The perfect understanding
that had been between us last night seemed ruthlessly disturbed and
perhaps broken. Could this be Miss Darrell's work? Had she made mischief
between us? I wondered what part of my conduct or actions she had
misrepresented to her cousin. It was this uncertainty that tormented
me: how could I refute mere intangible shadows?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account