"Wrong! Wrong! All wrong! And yet it seemed right to love God's
creatures.... Perhaps I loved them too much. So I am punished.... But,
after all, He knows: He understands. If they put me out of His church,
perhaps He will let me serve Him somewhere--somehow--I don't know where:
He knows. Oh, my God, if I have loved another more than Thee, forgive
me ... and let me rest ... for I am tired--tired--tired----"
The voice sank into an inarticulate murmur, in which the novice,
frightened and perplexed, could not distinguish words. Then there was
silence. One little sigh escaped those lips, and that was all. The
novice turned and fled, terrified at those words of prayer, which seemed
to him so different from any that he had ever heard--so different that
they must be wrong!
At four in the morning the monks came in to chant their morning prayer.
One by one they dropped into their places, scarcely noticing the
prostrate figure before the altar-steps. It was usual enough for one of
their number, or even a stranger staying in the monastery, to humiliate
himself in that manner as a public penance. The Prior only gave a little
start, as if an electric shock passed through his frame, when, on taking
his seat in the choir, his eye fell upon that motionless form. But he
did not leave his place until the last prayer had been said, the last
psalm chanted. Then he rose and walked deliberately to the place where
Dino lay, and laid his hand upon his head.
"My son!" he said, gently. There was a great fear in his face, a tremor
of startled emotion in his voice. "Dino, my beloved! I pardon thee."
But Dino did not hear. His prayer had been granted him; he was at rest.
God had been more merciful than man. The Prior's pardon came too late.
* * * * *
And far away, on a southern sea, where each great wave threatened to
engulf the tiny boat which seemed like a child's toy thrown upon the
waters, three men were struggling for dear life--for the life that Dino
Vasari had been so ready to lay down--toiling, with broken oars, and
roughly-fashioned sails, and ragged streamers as signals of distress, to
win their way back to solid land, and live once more with their fellows
the common but precious life of common men.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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