What a glorious thing to see
people and sovereign linked so together, keeping in the front rank of
civilisation, and carrying civilisation and Christianity--carrying
civilisation, Christianity--
'Great God, deliver me from this terrible haunting spirit of doubt!
Give me back full faith and peace.'
Now he began to hurry. He went up Constitution Hill, crossed
Piccadilly, and entered the Park at Hyde Park Corner.
There were very few people here now. It was dreary and desolate. The
bare trees looked sad and deserted in the bleak grey air. They seemed
the forgotten skeletons of funeral plumes that had waved over the dead
season. Nothing here appealed to his imagination. He continued his
walk.
Having followed the Serpentine for some minutes, he broke off from it
near the Humane Society's House, and found his way out of the Park in
the Bayswater Road through the Victoria Gate.
He walked to his left, and turned up into Kensington Garden Terrace,
and thence into the Grand Junction Road. Keeping north and following
the bend of the road, he came into the Marylebone Road. He held on
until he came to Park Square; he turned into the west side of Park
Square; then taking a wheel to the right, and then one to the left, he
entered the Broad Walk of Regent's Park.
'The Zoological Gardens!' he exclaimed to himself, with an inward
shudder. He was moving away to go, when he suddenly thought, 'Coward.'
Am I a coward? Am I afraid to look any of God's creatures in the
face?'
He turned on his heel and entered the Gardens. Like the Park, they
were almost deserted. But, unlike the Park, they were full of interest
to him. Some of the books he had recently been looking into, had begun
as treatises on natural history, and ended as indictments against
faith. It was a little past two o'clock, and few people were in front
of the cages, so he had every opportunity of inspecting the
collection.
He looked into cage after cage with steady disliking eyes. There was a
feeling of impulsion towards the cages, and repulsion from the
creatures behind the bars. The grey and gloomy day deadened his
spirits. He had slept nothing the night before. He had eaten nothing
that day. He did not notice the weather was dull. He did not remember
he had not slept. He had no knowledge of whether he had eaten or not.
All he knew was, he was trying to beat down his mind, and he thought
open air and exercise were the best remedies for his disease. But this
zoological collection had been thrown across his path like a
challenge, and come what might, he had taken up the glove.
For half-an-hour he wandered from cage to cage, until at last he stood
in front of the monkey-house. He paused awhile here, looked from right
to left, as though he would avoid the place if he could, then set his
face resolutely, and entered. As with the rest of the place, the
monkey-house was almost deserted. There were not more than a dozen
people in it.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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