'Well, if I prosper in this, I propose to go to Stratford--your old
place-and take a house there, and settle down as a member of a quiet
English family. I will grow into a middle-aged respectable man as soon
as I can, and you and your mother and younger sister and I will be the
greatest friends in the world--a kind of colony of love, down in that
dear old place of Shakespeare's.'
He paused again. No sound from the bed but the breathing, which had
grown more laboured. He waited awhile. He knew that Osborne shuddered;
though how he knew this he could not tell. Then the other spoke in a
constrained voice,--
'I. see nothing whatever to object to in what you propose. I think
nothing would please Kate or my mother more than that Kate's home
should be near Stratford. You said you intended asking me something.
What is it?'
'Oh yes. I want you to take me down to Stratford, introduce me to your
mother, and let me plead my cause with her. In fact, you can arrange
both our affairs--I mean yours and mine--at the one time.'
Nevill paused once more. The breathing had grown quieter. There was
not a sound. The room was as hushed as a stone. Nevill remained
perfectly still. Stop, there was a faint, very faint, sound. A soft,
delicate pat-pat-pat, as though you beat a table very gently with the
top of your finger. It could not be the beating of Osborne's heart. It
was too slow for that. What could it be?
'Why don't you speak, Osborne? What's the matter?'
Pat-pat-pat.
'Good God, Osborne, you are weeping!'
'Oh, my life, my life! Who gave me my life? Who has taken my life
away? Oh, my life, my life! Who gave me sight, and gives me darkness?
Dear God, turn away Thy wrath, and show me mercy! I am humbled and
punished. Let me come back to Thee and peace. Give me faith for this
void, light for this darkness. O God, my life!'
'Osborne! Osborne! Osborne!'
'In a moment.'
'Osborne!'
'A little while longer.'
'Now I am all right. I could not help it, Nevill. It came on me
suddenly. I had no power over myself. Will you forgive me, my dear
friend? I hope I may some day call you brother. It all came upon me at
once. I broke down when I thought of you and Kate being settled at
Stratford, and I--'
'You too will be settled there or somewhere else with Marie soon. Take
my word for it.'
'Ay. I may as well get up; and I may as well stop in bed. It is one of
the advantages of being ruined that all things are alike to you. You
are above or below every-day detail. I'll get up. It must be near six
now.'
'Yes; the quarter-to has struck.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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