Voltaire's Romances, Complete in One VolumeVoltaire
Philosophy
Voltaire's Romances, Complete in One Volume
Voltaire
French fiction -- Translations into English
Micromegas defended his philosophy with such spirit as made all the
female sex his proselytes; and the process lasted two hundred and twenty
years; at the end of which time, in consequence of the mufti's interest,
the book was condemned by judges who had never read it, and the author
expelled from court for the term of eight hundred years.
Not much affected at his banishment from a court that teemed with
nothing but turmoils and trifles, he made a very humorous song upon the
mufti, who gave himself no trouble about the matter, and set out on his
travels from planet to planet, in order (as the saying is) to improve
his mind and finish his education. Those who never travel but in a
post-chaise or berlin, will, doubtless, be astonished at the equipages
used above; for we that strut upon this little mole hill are at a loss
to conceive anything that surpasses our own customs. But our traveler
was a wonderful adept in the laws of gravitation, together with the
whole force of attraction and repulsion, and made such seasonable use of
his knowledge, that sometimes by the help of a sunbeam, and sometimes by
the convenience of a comet, he and his retinue glided from sphere to
sphere, as the bird hops from one bough to another. He in a very little
time posted through the milky way, and I am obliged to own he saw not a
twinkle of those stars supposed to adorn that fair empyrean, which the
illustrious Dr. Derham brags to have observed through his telescope. Not
that I pretend to say the doctor was mistaken. God forbid! But
Micromegas was upon the spot, an exceeding good observer, and I have no
mind to contradict any man. Be that as it may, after many windings and
turnings, he arrived at the planet Saturn; and, accustomed as he was to
the sight of novelties, he could not for his life repress a supercilious
and conceited smile, which often escapes the wisest philosopher, when he
perceived the smallness of that globe, and the diminutive size of its
inhabitants; for really Saturn is but about nine hundred times larger
than this our earth, and the people of that country mere dwarfs, about a
thousand fathoms high. In short, he at first derided those poor pigmies,
just as an Indian fiddler laughs at the music of Lully, at his first
arrival in Paris: but as this Sirian was a person of good sense, he soon
perceived that a thinking being may not be altogether ridiculous, even
though he is not quite six thousand feet high; and therefore he became
familiar with them, after they had ceased to wonder at his extraordinary
appearance. In particular, he contracted an intimate friendship with the
secretary of the Academy of Saturn, a man of good understanding, who,
though in truth he had invented nothing of his own, gave a very good
account of the inventions of others, and enjoyed in peace the reputation
of a little poet and great calculator. And here, for the edification of
the reader, I will repeat a very singular conversation that one day
passed between Mr.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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