Ikwarte arose and said, "Miss, do not let them abuse your good-nature;
do not let them make a fool of you. There is enough of it."
"This is not your affair," exclaimed Carl, "you Prussian!--you
starveling!"
"I have nothing to say to you," answered Ikwarte; "you are not worth
answering."
Martella danced again, to the great delight of all.
But while she was dancing, one could see that it took several of the
lads to hold Carl.
When the dance was over, Carl rushed up to Ikwarte, and cried:
"You cursed Prussian! why do you think that I am not worthy of being
answered?"
"I have no respect for a man who would put himself in the way of being
captured."
"Is that it?"
"Carl, take none of the Prussian's impudence," called out Martella. "It
is the Prussians' fault that my Ernst had to go forth into misery. Pay
him up for it!"
And then followed terrible scuffling and fighting.
Ikwarte seemed, at first, unable to realize that he was actually
involved in a fight; but when he saw that matters were in earnest, he
seized Carl, and held him as firmly as in a vise. Rothfuss urged them
on, for fighting was his delight. They were at last separated, and then
Martella threw herself on the ground, tore her hair, and cried out, "It
is all my fault! It is my fault! I am ruined!"
Rothfuss succeeded in leading her away. She tried to escape from him
and to run out into the woods, saying, "Anything rather than go back
home, for I don't deserve to go there."
He succeeded, at last, in inducing her to enter the house of Carl's
mother. Accompanied by Annette and Conny, I went there to bring her
home, and was startled when I saw what a change had come over the poor
child. Nevertheless, her agitation had not disfigured her; she seemed
more lovely than ever--almost supernaturally beautiful.
"O father!" she cried. "Indeed, I have no longer the right to use those
words. I knew it; I felt a presentiment of it all, and I wanted to go
away. Why didn't you let me go? I don't belong here, and now less than
ever. The worst that could have happened to me has happened. I have
relapsed into savage folly. And yet she who is up there said, 'Do not
lose faith in yourself and in your goodness, and you can accomplish
everything.' The worst punishment is mine, for I have lost faith in
myself. I may become crazed again any moment; I no longer believe in
myself."
When Conny and Annette spoke to her in their kind way, she exclaimed,
"Every kind word of yours gives me new pain. Scold me, beat me, kick
me--I deserve such treatment, and shall find it less painful than kind
words that I do not deserve. I was so happy in thinking that I had
accomplished all, but it is not so. Now I see how much love and respect
you all had for me; and when Ernst returns I shall tell him everything.
He may scold me heartily, for I have deserved it."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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