Watch Yourself Go ByField, Al. G. (Alfred Griffith)
General
Watch Yourself Go By
Field, Al. G. (Alfred Griffith)
Circus performers -- United States -- Biography; Field, Al. G. (Alfred Griffith), 1848-1921; Wit and humor
At the edge of town the team was halted to freshen them up for the
finish. The minstrels perched themselves picturesquely on the trunks,
posing as if for a photograph. The old horses were urged into a trot by
jerking and slapping the lines and wielding the whip. The pace was kept
up until the tavern was reached.
Charley Guttery, the landlord, was there to greet the minstrels. Mrs.
Guttery was a Davis before marriage, the sister of Uncle Bill's wife.
Therefore, Alfred was welcomed by the entire family.
All jumped out of the wagon except Tom White; he began unloading the
parcels, tossing them on the sidewalk. Out came the carpet-sack loaded
with chinaware. It struck the ground with a crash.
"There goes mother's china teapot smashed all to h--ll," piteously
whimpered the boy who furnished the dishes. He began to climb into the
wagon, vowing he would throw Tom White out quicker than he threw his
mother's teapot out. Tom was ready for fight and Eli had all he could do
to keep the boys apart.
All this was great amusement for the natives. "Let 'em go," one shouted,
"Let 'em fight; we'd ruther see the fight then yer show."
The large room of the tavern was filled with minstrels and town folks.
"Purty long ride ye hed fur such a big load," remarked one towner. Ere
Alfred could reply, a big gawk chimed in with: "By the dust on their
britches laigs I callerate they didn't ride much." Then all the crowd
laughed.
The pike was very dusty and the minstrels showed the effects of their
contact with it. "Well, ef they haint got a good show we'll gin 'em a
ride they won't furgit. Yes, an' the rail'll be three cornered. How many
monkeys has they?" yelled another. Then came quickly, "I dunno, I haint
counted 'em yit." This sally brought the biggest laugh yet heard.
Alfred's blood was boiling; he could stand it no longer. His fist shot
out and immediately there were legs and arms sprawling all over the
floor; the crowd trampled each other as they stampeded, all endeavoring
to exit through the one door at the same time. Once outside, several of
them, more bold than the others, began making threats and movements to
re-enter and bring Alfred out. At this juncture the old stage driver and
Eli waded into them and soon there was not one of the rowdies to be
seen.
Alfred was hustled upstairs and into a room and ordered to remain quiet
until further developments. The constable was soon on the scene with
warrants for Eli and the old driver. They were taken before a justice of
the peace and, by the advice of Mr. Guttery, they requested a
continuance of the case until the following morning. This was granted.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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