Watch Yourself Go ByField, Al. G. (Alfred Griffith)
General
Watch Yourself Go By
Field, Al. G. (Alfred Griffith)
Circus performers -- United States -- Biography; Field, Al. G. (Alfred Griffith), 1848-1921; Wit and humor
Rev. Gideon was the last of the trio whom Alfred figured out. He had
married Palmer's sister. They went to a foreign country as missionaries;
Gideon's health gave way under the tropical climate. He returned to this
country and had since made his home with the Palmers. But little was
learned of the wife. She still lived, and if remittances were not
forthcoming, Gideon was on the rack. In fact, each one of her
complaining letters made Gideon turn more yellow in color, sit up later
and get up earlier than usual, no matter how poor Gideon suffered. If he
was ailing and Palmer noticed it, he would sneer and jerk out: "Huh! Got
a letter from Sis, did you? S'pose she wants you to go back to China.
Say Gideon, that must have been a hell of a job to instill the gospel
into heathen when you can't make an impression upon those who understand
what you say. It must have been discouraging to waste your eloquence
upon those copper-colored thieves. There's many a game to catch suckers
in this world but that foreign mission play is the rawest ever sprung.
Say, Gideon, how much did you get? So much for each sinner saved or did
you lump the job?"
Under such cynicism Gideon would turn about and walk off as though
nothing had been said to him. Palmer took an especial delight in teasing
Gideon as to his mission labors. Gideon never deigned to notice the
ridicule of Palmer, at least in words. Yet there was one thing that
impressed Alfred. Palmer always deferred to Gideon in any business
proposition under consideration; he would bluster and rave a little but
always in the end gave in to Gideon's judgment.
In addition to the receipts that came to him from the exhibition of the
panorama, Palmer had a large, framed, steel plate engraving of John
Bunyan which he sold while soliciting subscriptions for several
religious publications. He worked diligently. He never desisted when he
once went after preacher, deacon or the entire congregation, and he
generally sold what he offered or secured their names to one of his
numerous subscription lists.
He worked so adroitly that he made many his aides. Not infrequently a
minister would get up during an intermission in the Pilgrim's Progress
exhibition and announce one or more of Palmer's offerings. These
announcements invariably wound up with the statement that the proceeds
were for the benefit of a retired minister who had lost his health in an
endeavor to carry the gospel to the heathen in foreign lands.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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