On the platform a poet was reciting his pre-electoral ode. I could
not hear a single word; I only felt the rhythmic swing of the
hexametric pendulum, and with its every motion I felt how nearer and
nearer there was approaching some hour set for.... I continued to
turn over face after face like pages but I could not find the one,
the only one, I was seeking, the one I needed to find at once, as
soon as possible, for one more swing of the pendulum and....
It was he, certainly it was he! Below, past the main platform,
gliding over the sparkling glass, the ear-wings flapped by, the
running body gave a reflection of a double-curved S-, like a noose
which was rolling toward some of the intricate passages among the
stands. S-, I-330,--there is some thread between them. I have always
felt some thread between them. I don't know yet what that thread is
but some day I shall untangle it. I planted my gaze on him; he was
rushing farther away, behind him that invisible thread.... There he
stopped ... there.... I was pierced, twisted together into a knot as
if by a lightning-like, many-volted electric discharge; in my row,
not more than 40° from me, S- stopped and bowed. I saw I-330 and
beside her the smiling, repellent, negro-lipped R-13.
My first thought was to rush to her and cry, "Why with him? Why did
you not want...?" But the salutary invisible spider-web bound fast
my hands and feet; so, gritting my teeth together I sat stiff as
iron, my gaze fixed upon them. A sharp _physical_ pain at my heart.
I remember my thought: "if non-physical causes effect physical pain,
then it is clear that...."
I regret that I did not come to any conclusion. I remember only that
something about "soul" flashed through my mind, a purely nonsensical
ancient expression, "His soul fell into his boots" passed through my
head. My heart sank. The hexameter came to an end. It was about to
start. What "It"?
The five minute pre-election recess established by custom. The
custom-established pre-electional silence. But now it was not that
pious, really prayer-like silence that it usually was. Now it was
as in the ancient days when there were no Accumulating Towers,
when the sky, still untamed in those days, would roar from time to
time with its "storms." It was like the "lull before the storm"
of the ancient days. The air seemed to be made of transparent,
vaporized cast-iron. One wanted to breathe with one's mouth wide
open. My hearing, intense to painfulness, registered from behind a
mouse-like, gnawing, worried whisper. Without lifting my eyes I saw
those two, I-330 and R-13, side by side, shoulder to shoulder,--and
on my knees my trembling, foreign, hateful, hairy hands....
Everybody was holding a badge with a clock in his hands. One....
Two.... Three.... Five minutes. From the main platform a cast-iron,
slow voice:
"Those in favor shall lift their hands."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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