“Herr Haeberlein has come here to be nursed,” said Raeburn when the
greetings were over. “Will you see that a room is got ready, dear?”
He went out into the hall to dismiss the cab, and Haeberlein seized the
opportunity to correct his words.
“He thinks I shall get better, but it is impossible, my Herzblattchen;
it is only a question of weeks now, possibly only of days. Was I wrong
to come to you?”
“Of course not,” she said with the sort of tender deference with which
she always spoke to him. “Did you think father would let you go anywhere
else?”
“I didn't think about it,” said Haeberlein wearily; “but he wouldn't, you
see.”
Raeburn returned while he was speaking, and Erica went away quickly to
see to the necessary preparations. Herr Haeberlein had come, and she did
not for a moment question the rightness of her father's decision; but
yet in her heart she was troubled about it, and she could see that both
her aunt and Tom were troubled too. The fact was that for some time
they had seen plainly enough that Raeburn's health was failing, and they
dreaded any additional anxiety for him. A man can not be involved
in continual and harassing litigation and at the same time agitate
perseveringly for reform, edit a newspaper, write books, rush from
Land's End to John O'Groat's, deliver lectures, speak at mass meetings,
teach science, befriend every unjustly used person, and go through the
enormous amount of correspondence, personal supervision, and inevitable
interviewing which falls to the lot of every popular leader, without
sooner or later breaking down.
Haeberlein had come, however, and there was no help for it. They all did
their very utmost for him, and those last weeks of tender nursing were
perhaps the happiest of his life. Raeburn never allowed any one to see
how the lingering expectation, the dark shadow of the coming sorrow,
tried him. He lived his usual busy life, snatching an hour whenever he
could to help in the work of nursing, and bringing into the sick room
the strange influence of his strength and serenity.
The time wore slowly on. Haeberlein, though growing perceptibly weaker,
still lingered, able now and then to enter into conversation, but for
the most part just lying in patient silence, listening with a curious
impartiality to whatever they chose to read to him, or whatever they
began to talk about. He had all his life been a man of no particular
creed, and he retained his curious indifference to the end, though Erica
found that he had a sort of vague belief in a First Cause, and a shadowy
expectation of a personal existence after death. She found this out
through Brian, who had a way of getting at the minds of his patients.
One very hot afternoon she had been with him for several hours when
about five o'clock her father came into the room. Another prosecution
under the blasphemy Laws had just commenced. He had spent the whole day
in a stifling law court, and even to the dying man his exhaustion was
apparent.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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