Hester and the major got Corney to bed, and instantly he was fast
asleep. The major arranged himself to pass the night by the fire, and
Hester went to see what she could do for her mother. Knocking softly at
the door and receiving no answer, she peeped in: there sat her father
and there slept her mother: she would not disturb them, but, taking her
share in the punishment of him she had brought home, retire without
welcome or good-night. She too was presently fast asleep. There was no
gnawing worm of duty undone or wrong unpardoned in her bosom to keep her
awake. Sorrow is sleepy, pride and remorse are wakeful.
CHAPTER LII.
A HEAVENLY VISION.
The night began differently with the two watchers. The major was
troubled in his mind at what seemed the hard-heartedness of the mother,
for he loved her with a true brotherly affection. He had not seen her
looking in at the door; he did not know the cause of her appearing so
withdrawn and unmotherly: he forgot his shilling novel and his sherry
and water, and brooded over the thing. He could not endure the
low-minded cub, he said to himself; he would gladly, if only the wretch
were well enough, give him a sound horse-whipping; but to see him so
treated by father and mother was more than he could bear: he began to
pity a lad born of parents so hard-hearted. What would have become of
himself, he thought, if his mother had treated him so? He had never, to
be sure, committed any crime against society worse than shocking certain
ridiculously proper people; but if she had made much of his foibles and
faults, he might have grown to be capable of doing how could he tell
what? who would turn out a mangy dog that was his own dog! If the fellow
were his he would know what to do with him! He did not reflect that just
because he was not his, he did not feel the wounds that disabled from
action. It was easy for him unhurt to think what he would do if he were
hurt. Some things seem the harder to forgive the greater the love. It is
but a false seeming, thank God, and comes only of selfishness, which
makes both the love and the hurt seem greater than they are.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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