|It seemed to her that there was something marvellously appropriate in
the punishment which was to be his, and she would not stretch out a hand
to avert it. He who had made her to suffer for her constancy to him was
about to suffer for his cruelty to her. Her love had brought suffering
to her, and it was surely the justice of Heaven which had decreed that
his new love was to mean suffering to himself.
She could not feel the least pity for him; on the contrary, she felt
ready to exult over him--to laugh in his face when the blow had fallen
upon him. She felt that she should like to see him crushed to the
earth--overwhelmed when he fancied that his hour of triumph had come.
Only this night did the desire to see him punished take possession of
her. She wondered how it was that she had been so patient in the face of
the wrong which he had done to her. When she had flung down and trampled
on the ivory miniature of him which had stood on her table, she had wept
over the fragments, and the next day she had been filled with remorse.
She had seen him many times since that day, but no reproach had passed
her lips, for no reproach had been in her heart. She had merely thought
of him as having ceased to love her whom he had promised to love. But
now when she stood alone in her room, knowing that he had not merely
forsaken her but had come to love another woman, her hands clenched and
her heart burned with the desire of revenge.
A few hours before, she had been shocked by his desire to be revenged
upon the wretch who had killed his brother; but she did not think of
this as she paced her room in the sway of that sudden passion which had
come to her. She felt exultant in the thought of his coming humiliation.
It was the justice of Heaven overtaking him. She would laugh in his face
when the blow fell upon him.
An hour had transformed her. She had flung her patience and her
forbearance to the winds. She hated herself for the folly of her
fidelity all those years; but she did not think of Clare with any
feeling of jealousy. On the contrary, she felt that the girl was an
ally. Without Clare the man would escape all punishment; but with her as
an ally he would be crushed.
She was too excited to sleep when at last she got into bed. The rush of
this new, strange passion carried her along, and she experienced that
positive pleasure of yielding to it, which a release from all trammels
of civilisation brings for a time to most people of a healthy nature.
She had in a moment been released from the strain which she had put
upon herself for so tong. She felt that she was a woman at last--a woman
carried along by the most natural of woman's impulses: a passion for
revenge. After all, such constancy as had been hers was an agony and not
a pleasure. Claude Westwood had spoken the truth: it should be taken for
granted that after the lapse of a certain time the validity of a promise
made in love ceased.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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