As may well be imagined, recent events, as far as he understood them,
had stirred Arden's sensitive nature to the very depths. Hiding his
feelings from all save his mother, and often from her; appearing to
his neighbors stolid and sullen in the extreme, he was, in fact, in
his whole being, like a morbidly-excited nerve. He did not shrink from
the world because indifferent to it, but because it wounded him when
he came in contact with it. He seemed so out of tune with society that
it produced only jarring discord. His father's course brought him many
real slights, and these he resented as we have seen, and he resented
fancied slights quite as often, and thus he had cut himself off from
the sympathies, and even the recognition, of nearly all.
But what human soul can dwell alone? The true hermit finds in
communion with the Divine mind the perfection of companionship. But
Arden knew not God. He had heard of Him all his life; but Jove and
Thor were images more familiar to his mind than that of his Creator.
He loved his mother and sister, but their life seemed a poor, shaded
little nook, where they toiled and moped. And so, to satisfy the
cravings of his lonely heart, he had created and peopled an unreal
world of his own, in which he dwelt most of the time. As his interest
in the real world ceased, his imagination more vividly portrayed the
shadowy one, till at last, in the scenes of poetry and fiction, and
the splendid panorama of history, he thought he might rest satisfied,
and find all the society he needed in converse with those whom, by a
refinement of spiritualism, he could summon to his side from any age
or land. He secretly exulted in the still greater magic by which the
unreal creatures of poetic thought would come at his volition, and he
often smiled to think how royally attended was "old, drunken Lacey's"
son, whom many of the neighbors thought scarcely better than the
horses he drove.
Thus he lived under a spell of the past, in a world moon-lighted by
sentiment and fancy, surrounded by his ideals of those about whom he
read, and Shakespeare's vivid, life-like women were better known to
him than any of the ladies of Pushton. But dreams cannot last in our
material world, and ghosts vanish in the sunlight of fact. Woman's
nature is as beautiful and fascinating now as when the master-hand of
the world's greatest poet delineated it, and when living, breathing
Edith Allen stepped suddenly among his shadows, seemingly so luminous,
they vanished before her, as the stars pale into nothingness when the
eastern sky is aglow with morning. Now, in all his horizon, she only
shone, but the past seemed like night, and the present, day.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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