When shadows dieSouthworth, Emma Dorothy Eliza Nevitte
General
When shadows die
Southworth, Emma Dorothy Eliza Nevitte
American fiction -- 19th century
“You know what followed. He came down with us to Mondreer. He cast his
eyes upon our dear daughter, Odalite, and on her fortune—not only on her
American fortune, but on her English prospects.
“Ah! my poor Odalite! She was engaged to be married to her faithful
lover, Leonidas Force, who was expected home on the Christmas of that
year; and she was as true as truth to her love; she was not for a moment
‘fascinated by the admiration of the brilliant stranger,’ as people
said. She sacrificed herself to save me; and in saving me, to save you
and her sisters.
“Do you know what that snake who had entered our paradise threatened to
do if he were not bought off by the hand and fortune and prospects of
our daughter Odalite? He threatened to publish my secret to the whole
world!
“Ah! how I mourned then that I had not told you the sad story before
accepting your offer of marriage, and left you free to withdraw or to
renew that offer.
“It was too late then! Every year that I had kept the story from you
made it harder and more humiliating to tell. And he threatened to
tell—not you—that would have been terrible enough—but to tell
everybody!—to tell the story in the barrooms of the country inns, at the
gentlemen’s wine parties and oyster suppers—and everywhere! He would
leave our house, take up his lodgings at the Calvert, and spread the
venom over the whole community. That would have been fatal! Abel, this
story, as he would have told it, must have driven us all in dishonor
from the neighborhood. I think it would have killed you. You are strong
and brave, and could have borne much—everything but dishonor! That would
have killed you! I know it would have driven me mad, and it would have
blighted the lives of our children.
“I was nearly insane, even then. Some women in such a position would
have committed suicide; but, apart from its sinfulness, it would have
been ineffectual in my case, as, if I had died, he would still have
blackmailed Odalite. Some other women in my position would have killed
Anglesea. I knew that; and I knew that if ever man deserved death at a
woman’s hands, he did at mine; but I was not even tempted so ruthlessly
to break the sacred laws of God. Nay, let me say here, that weak, blind
and foolish as I have been, I have not only tried to keep, but I have
kept those laws from my youth up.
“What is it, then, that I have confessed to you? Not a sin, not a fault,
but a secret that I have kept from you because I had not strength enough
to tell you, or light enough to know you, or wisdom enough to confide in
your wisdom. It was no sin of mine that my marriage was a deception
practiced upon me; but it was a great wrong to you to keep the secret of
that marriage.
“You know now the secret of my life—why I consented to sacrifice Odalite
to that man, from whom she was saved as by a miracle.
“Is it a mockery to ask you to pardon this lifelong secret, Abel? I know
that you will pardon as freely as God pardons.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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