White nights, and other storiesDostoyevsky, Fyodor
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White nights, and other stories
Dostoyevsky, Fyodor
Dostoyevsky, Fyodor, 1821-1881 -- Translations into English; Russian fiction -- Translations into English
"Vasya," began Arkady Ivanovitch resolutely, "Vasya, I will save you. I
understand it all. It's a serious matter; I will save you. Listen!
listen to me: I will go to Yulian Mastakovitch to-morrow.... Don't shake
your head; no, listen! I will tell him exactly how it has all been; let
me do that ... I will explain to him.... I will go into everything. I
will tell him how crushed you are, how you are worrying yourself."
"Do you know that you are killing me now?" Vasya brought out, turning
cold with horror.
Arkady Ivanovitch turned pale, but at once controlling himself, laughed.
"Is that all? Is that all?" he said. "Upon my word, Vasya, upon my word!
Aren't you ashamed? Come, listen! I see that I am grieving you. You see
I understand you; I know what is passing in your heart. Why, we have
been living together for five years, thank God! You are such a kind,
soft-hearted fellow, but weak, unpardonably weak. Why, even Lizaveta
Mikalovna has noticed it. And you are a dreamer, and that's a bad thing,
too; you may go from bad to worse, brother. I tell you, I know what you
want! You would like Yulian Mastakovitch, for instance, to be beside
himself and, maybe, to give a ball, too, from joy, because you are going
to get married.... Stop, stop! you are frowning. You see that at one
word from me you are offended on Yulian Mastakovitch's account. I'll let
him alone. You know I respect him just as much as you do. But argue as
you may, you can't prevent my thinking that you would like there to be
no one unhappy in the whole world when you are getting married.... Yes,
brother, you must admit that you would like me, for instance, your best
friend, to come in for a fortune of a hundred thousand all of a sudden,
you would like all the enemies in the world to be suddenly, for no rhyme
or reason, reconciled, so that in their joy they might all embrace one
another in the middle of the street, and then, perhaps, come here to
call on you. Vasya, my dear boy, I am not laughing; it is true; you've
said as much to me long ago, in different ways. Because you are happy,
you want every one, absolutely every one, to become happy at once. It
hurts you and troubles you to be happy alone. And so you want at once to
do your utmost to be worthy of that happiness, and maybe to do some
great deed to satisfy your conscience. Oh! I understand how ready you
are to distress yourself for having suddenly been remiss just where you
ought to have shown your zeal, your capacity ... well, maybe your
gratitude, as you say. It is very bitter for you to think that Yulian
Mastakovitch may frown and even be angry when he sees that you have not
justified the expectations he had of you. It hurts you to think that you
may hear reproaches from the man you look upon as your benefactor--and
at such a moment! when your heart is full of joy and you don't know on
whom to lavish your gratitude.... Isn't that true? It is, isn't it?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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