Charley looked no less miserable than I felt. I saw that his conscience
was speaking, and I knew he was the last in the world to succeed in
excusing himself. But I understood him better than he understood
himself, and believed that his idleness arose from the old unrest, the
weariness of that never satisfied questioning which the least attempt
at thought was sure to awaken. Once invaded by a question, Charley
_must_ answer it, or fail and fall into a stupor. Not an ode of Horace
could he read without finding himself plunged into metaphysics.
Enamoured of repose above all things, he was from every side stung to
inquiry which seldom indeed afforded what seemed solution. Hence, in
part at least, it came that he had begun to study not merely how to
avoid awakening the Sphinx, but by what opiates to keep her stretched
supine with her lovely woman face betwixt her fierce lion-paws. This
also, no doubt, had a share in his becoming the associate of Geoffrey
Brotherton, from whose company, if he had been at peace with himself,
he would have recoiled upon the slightest acquaintance. I am at some
loss to imagine what could have made Geoffrey take such a liking to
Charley; but I presume it was the confiding air characterizing all
Charley’s behaviour that chiefly pleased him. He seemed to look upon
him with something of the tenderness a coarse man may show for a
delicate Italian greyhound, fitted to be petted by a lady.
That same evening Charley came to my rooms. His manner was constrained,
and yet suggested a whole tide of pent-up friendship which, but for
some undeclared barrier, would have broken out and overflowed our
intercourse. After this one evening, however, it was some time before I
saw him again. When I called upon him next he was not at home, nor did
he come to see me. Again I sought him, but with like failure. After a
third attempt I desisted, not a little hurt, I confess, but not in the
least inclined to quarrel with him. I gave myself the more diligently
to my work.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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