I was on my knees in the midst of a pile which I had drawn from a
cupboard under the shelves, when Mrs Herbert showed Mr Coningham in. I
was annoyed, for my uncle’s room was sacred; but as I was about to take
him to my own, I saw such a look of interest upon his face that it
turned me aside, and I asked him to take a seat.
‘If you do not mind the dust,’ I said.
‘Mind the dust!’ he exclaimed, ‘--of old books! I count it almost
sacred. I am glad you know how to value them.’
What right had he to be glad? How did he know I valued them? How could
I but value them? I rebuked my offence, however, and after a little
talk about them, in which he revealed much more knowledge than I should
have expected, it vanished. He then informed me of an arrangement he
and Lord Inglewold’s factor had been talking over in respect of the
farm; also of an offer he had had for my field. I considered both
sufficiently advantageous in my circumstances, and the result was that
I closed with both.
A few days after this arrangement I returned to London, intending to
remain for some time. I had a warm welcome from Charley, but could not
help fancying an unacknowledged something dividing us. He appeared,
notwithstanding, less oppressed, and, in a word, more like other
people. I proceeded at once to finish two or three papers and stories,
which late events had interrupted. But within a week London had grown
to me stifling and unendurable, and I longed unspeakably for the free
air of my field and the loneliness of my small castle. If my reader
regard me as already a hypochondriac, the sole disproof I have to offer
is, that I was then diligently writing what some years afterwards
obtained a hearty reception from the better class of the reading
public. Whether my habits were healthy or not, whether my love of
solitude was natural or not, I cannot but hope from this that my modes
of thinking were. The end was that, after finishing the work I had on
hand, I collected my few belongings, gave up my lodging, bade Charley
good-bye, receiving from him a promise to visit me at my own house if
possible, and took my farewell of London for a season, determined not
to return until I had produced a work which my now more enlarged
judgment might consider fit to see the light. I had laid out all my
spare money upon books, with which, in a few heavy trunks, I now went
back to my solitary dwelling. I had no care upon my mind, for my small
fortune, along with the rent of my field, was more than sufficient for
my maintenance in the almost anchoretic seclusion in which I intended
to live, and hence I had every advantage for the more definite
projection and prosecution of a work which had been gradually shaping
itself in my mind for months past.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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