I suppose I awoke tossing in my misery, for my hand fell upon something
cold. I started up and tried to see. The light of a clear morning of
late Autumn had stolen into the room while I slept, and glimmered on
something that lay upon the bed. It was some time before I could
believe that my troubled eyes were not the sport of one of those odd
illusions that come of mingled sleep and waking. But by the golden hilt
and rusted blade I was at length convinced, although the scabbard was
gone, that I saw my own sword. It lay by my left side, with the hilt
towards my hand. But the moment I turned a little to take it in my
right hand, I forgot all about it in a far more bewildering discovery,
which fixed me staring half in terror, half in amazement, so that again
for a moment I disbelieved in my waking condition. On the other pillow
lay the face of a lovely girl. I felt as if I had seen it
before--whether only in the just vanished dream, I could not tell. But
the maiden of my dream never comes back to me with any other features
or with any other expression than those which I now beheld. There was
an ineffable mingling of love and sorrow on the sweet countenance. The
girl was dead asleep, but evidently dreaming, for tears were flowing
from under her closed lids. For a time I was unable even to think;
when thought returned, I was afraid to move. All at once the face of
Mary Osborne dawned out of the vision before me--how different,
how glorified from its waking condition! It was perfectly
lovely--transfigured by the unchecked outflow of feeling. The
recognition brought me to my senses at once. I did not waste a single
thought in speculating how the mistake had occurred, for there was not
a moment to be lost. I must be wise to shield her, and chiefly, as much
as might be, from the miserable confusion which her own discovery of
the untoward fact would occasion her. At first I thought it would be
best to lie perfectly still, in order that she, at length awaking and
discovering where she was, but finding me fast asleep, might escape
with the conviction that the whole occurrence remained her own secret.
I made the attempt, but I need hardly say that never before or since
have I found myself in a situation half so perplexing; and in a few
moments I was seized with such a trembling that I was compelled to turn
my thoughts to the only other possible plan. As I reflected, the
absolute necessity of attempting it became more and more apparent. In
the first place, when she woke and saw me, she might scream and be
heard; in the next, she might be seen as she left the room, or, unable
to find her way, might be involved in great consequent embarrassment.
But, if I could gather all my belongings, and, without awaking her,
escape by the stair to the roof, she would be left to suppose that she
had but mistaken her chamber, and would, I hoped, remain in ignorance
that she had not passed the night in it alone. I dared one more peep
into her face.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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