Willy Reilly: The Works of William Carleton, Volume OneCarleton, William
General
Willy Reilly: The Works of William Carleton, Volume One
Carleton, William
Ireland -- Social life and customs -- Fiction
At length the day mentioned for the dinner arrived, and, at the
appointed hour, so also did the guests. There were some ladies asked to
keep Helen in countenance, but we need scarcely say, that as the list of
them was made out by her thoughtless father, he paid, in the selection
of some of them, very little attention to her feelings. There was the
sheriff, Mr. Oxley, and his lady--the latter a compound in whom it was
difficult to determine whether pride, vulgarity, or obesity prevailed.
Where the sheriff had made his capture of her was never properly known,
as neither of them belonged originally to that neighborhood in which he
had, several years ago, purchased large property. It was said he had got
her in London; and nothing was more certain than that she issued forth
the English language clothed in an inveterate cockney accent. She was a
high moralist, and a merciless castigator of all females who manifested,
or who were supposed to manifest, even a tendency to walk out of the
line of her own peculiar theory on female conduct. Her weight might be
about eighteen stone, exclusive of an additional stone of gold chains
and bracelets, in which she moved like a walking gibbet, only with the
felon in it; and to crown all, she wore on her mountainous bosom a cameo
nearly the size of a frying-pan. Sir Jenkins Joram, who took her down to
dinner, declared, on feeling the size of the bracelets which encircled
her wrists, that he labored for a short time under the impression that
he and she were literally handcuffed together; an impression, he added,
from which he was soon relieved by the consoling reflection that it was
the sheriff himself whom the clergyman had sentenced to stand in that
pleasant predicament. Of Mrs. Brown and Mrs. Hastings we have only to
say that they were modest, sensible, unassuming women, without either
parade or pretence, such, in fact, as you will generally meet among
our well-bred and educated countrywomen. Lord Deilmacare was a widower,
without family, and not a marrying man. Indeed, when pressed upon this
subject, he was never known to deviate from the one reply.
“Why don't you marry again, my lord?--will you ever marry?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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