England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; Families -- Fiction; Stepmothers -- Fiction
When Lottie got up next morning the world seemed to have changed to her.
It had changed a little in reality, as sometimes one day differs from
another in autumn, the world having visibly made a more marked
revolution than usual in a single night. It had got on to the end of
August, and there were traces of many fiery fingers upon the leaves on
the Slopes. It had been a very fine summer, but it was coming
prematurely to an end, everybody said, and about the horizon there began
to be veils of luminous mist in the morning, and soft haze that veiled
the evening light. This autumnal aspect of the world seemed to have come
on in that one night. The Virginian creeper round the window had
“turned” in several patches of scarlet and yellow all at once. It was
beautiful, but it was the first step towards winter and the chills--the
first evidence of a year decaying which makes the spectator pause and
think. When Lottie woke she felt in her heart that consciousness of
something, she knew not what, something that had happened to her, that
over-shadowed her, and forced itself upon her before she could tell
what it was, which is the way care manifests itself at our bedsides:
something that made her heart heavy the first thing on awaking. Then she
remembered what it was. Lottie, we have said, was not a girl who was in
the habit of taking advice; but for that once she had taken it, seizing
upon the first trustworthy witness she could find who would bring an
impartial eye to the problem of her life. She had been very strong in
her own opinion before, but when reason was put before her Lottie could
not shut her eyes to it. Neither could she dawdle and delay when there
was anything to do. She awoke with the consciousness that some ghost was
lurking behind her white curtains. Then with a start and shiver
remembered and realised it, and, drawing herself together, made up her
mind to act at once. What was the use of putting off? Putting off was
the reason why Law was so backward, and Lottie was not one of those who
let the grass grow under their feet. The more disagreeable the first
step was, the more reason was there that it should be taken to-day. She
went downstairs with a gleam of resolution in her eyes. After the shock
of finding out that there is a painful thing to do, the determination to
do it at once is a relief. It brings an almost pleasure into the pain to
set your face to it bravely and get done with it; there is thus an
exhilaration even in what is most disagreeable. So Lottie felt. Her
despondency and depression were gone. She had something definite to do,
and she would do it, let what obstacle soever stand in the way. She made
the family tea and cut the bread with more energy than usual. She was
the first visible, as she always was, but her mind was fully occupied
with her own affairs, and she was glad enough to be alone for half an
hour. After that she had to go up again and knock at her father’s door,
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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