Families -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; New York (N.Y.) -- History -- 19th century -- Fiction
RoBards’ eyes wandered and fell upon the hearthstone at his feet with
the firelight shuttling about it in ripples. Jud Lasher was under there.
He must not hide the child in these same walls. There would be
something burlesque about that. Strange, hideous, loathsome truth that
the most sorrowful things have only to be repeated to become comic!
He walked away from the hearthstone. It was too much like a headstone.
He went to the window. The night had not changed. The earth was
stowed away under a great tight tarpaulin of snow. The sky was a vast
steel-blue windowpane frosted with stars and the long ice-trail of the
Milky Way.
Through the snow a few trees stood upthrust. Among them the little
tulip trees huddled together slim and still. There beneath were the
bodies of his children and Patty’s. He had seen Patty cry over them
as Immy had done, and sway with their still frames, according to that
inveterate habit women have of rocking their children, awake or asleep,
alive, or——
Immy’s baby belonged out there with the family—with its tiny uncle and
its tiny aunt. They would not flinch from it or snub it because of the
absence of a marriage ceremony. It had not been to blame. There was
nothing it could have done to insist upon such a provision; nothing
to prevent its own arrival. It brought with it a certain sanctifying
grace. It brought with it a certain penitential suffering.
RoBards nodded to himself, went to Patty and told her his plan,
and then hastened to find in the cellar an axe and a shovel, and a
discarded empty box of the nearest size for its purpose.
He put on his heaviest coat, his boots and his gloves, and a heavy
scarf. In the meantime Patty had fetched the child. She whispered:
“When I took it from her, her hands resisted. Her lips made a kissing
sound and she mumbled something that sounded like, ‘Baby go by-by!’”
Patty had wrapped the little form in a silken shawl she had always
prized since it came out of China in one of her father’s ships—in
the wonderful days when she had had a father and he had had ships. A
girlish jealousy had persisted in her heart and she would never let
Immy wear that shawl. Now she gave it up because it was the only thing
she could find in the house precious enough to honor the going guest
and be a sacrifice.
RoBards pushed out into the snow with his weapons and his casket, and
made his way to the young tulip trees, which were no longer so young as
he imagined them.
The snow was ice and turned the shovel aside. He must crack its surface
with the ax, and it was hard for his frozen fingers to grip the handle.
Only the sheer necessity of finishing the work made it possible for him
to stand the pain. By the time he reached the soil deep below, he was
so tired and so hot that he flung off his overcoat and his muffler and
gloves.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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