It may well be doubted if the light of Christmas day dawned on a
sadder household than that which was sheltered in the old mansion.
Worn and exhausted to the last degree, and yet sleepless from
anxiety, grief, and shame, the two women watched beside the fitful,
half-conscious man. At last he appeared to throw off his stupor
sufficiently to recognize his wife; but it was with a strange look,
in which were blended fear, suspicion, and shame. A cold perspiration
broke out over his whole form, for something in her expression,
and especially in the aspect of Mildred's face, seemed to indicate
that they knew all, and his own guilty fears and conscience made
the surmise true for the moment; but the tender manner in which
his wife wiped his brow and kissed him were reassuring, and with
his rallying powers grew the hope that his weakness might yet be
unknown and successfully concealed until, by his physician's aid,
he had thrown off the curse. Fearing above and beyond all things else
that his wife would learn his degradation, he slowly and fitfully
tried to mature plans of deception; but his enfeebled mind rallied
so slowly that he felt for a time that silence and observation
were his best allies. He would cautiously and suspiciously feel his
way, and having learned all that had transpired since he remembered
being on the steamer, he could then decide more clearly how to
shape his course. He therefore affected to regard his condition as
the result of a severe illness, and murmured that "quiet and home
life would soon bring him round."
Mildred kissed him also, and answered, "We cannot think otherwise,
papa, for our love, our lives, and all are bound up in you."
The morning dragged heavily away, for all except the little ones
were under the impression that dark and woful days were before
them. Mr. Benton had not disguised the truth--that the problem with
which they had to deal was one of great difficulty and much doubt.
This prospect was depressing, but that which weighed like lead
upon their hearts was the thought that one who had ever been their
ideal of honor and truth had deceived them for months, and had
steadily yielded to a habit which he knew must destroy his family's
honor and leave them friendless, penniless, and disgraced. The
weeks of pain that Mildred had endured were not the result of a
hard necessity, but of a vicious indulgence of a depraved appetite.
Not disease but sin had so darkened their lives and brought them
to a pass where even daily bread and shelter for the future were
doubtful questions.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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