"What I saw in your face," he said gravely, "is my misfortune.
It is not anything for which you are to blame in the least. And,
Millie, I'd rather have your friendship than any other woman's love.
I'm choosing my own course with my eyes open, and, thank God, I've
chosen rightly. I'd have been the most miserable fellow in the whole
city if I had chosen otherwise. Now I'm happy. It's all right. I've
vowed to be a brother to Belle, and to do all in my power for your
sweet, gentle mother. I've vowed to be your true friend in all
respects, and if you protested till Doomsday it wouldn't make any
difference. I've written to my mother, and I know her well enough
to be sure that she will approve of my course. So will my father
by and by. He isn't bad at heart, but, like uncle, a dollar is so
large in his eyes that it hides the sun. Be that as it may, I'm
just as much of an Atwood as he is, and can be just as obstinate
in doing what I know to be right as he can be in requiring a course
that would spoil my life. Millie, there never was a soldier, in
all the past, braver than you have shown yourself to be, and you
are a delicate girl that I could carry like a child. Do you advise
a young, strong-handed fellow to play the coward, and desert the
women I love and honor in their sore need and danger? You have
looked on only one side of this question, and you must not think
so meanly of me as to even suggest anything of the kind again."
"Roger, Roger, can you realize what you are saying?" Mildred
faltered, a slow, painful flush crimsoning her face. "How can you
honor those who are so disgraced? You don't know what papa has
become. The world will share your uncle's views concerning us."
"I do know all about your father, Millie, and I pity him from the
depths of my soul. He is the dark background which brings out your
absolute truth and purity. I do honor you and Mrs. Jocelyn as I
honor my own mother, and I intend to prove myself worthy of your
respect at least, for its loss would be fatal to me. I even honor
your rare fidelity, though it stands so awfully in my way. Now,
surely, we understand each other. But, come, this is far too serious
talk for a restaurant and the supper-table. I am now going to give
my whole soul to oysters, and I adjure you by our bonds to do the
same. Here's to our friendship, Millie, and may I be choked the
moment I'm false to it!" and he drained a generous cup of coffee.
"You won't listen to me, then," she said, with a face wherein
perplexity, relief, and gratitude were blended.
"I won't listen to a word that will make me the most miserable
wretch in the world, and you won't get rid of me as long as I live.
So, there, you might as well submit to fate and eat your oysters."
Her expression became very grave and resolute. "Roger," she said
slowly, "I did not know there was so kind and true a man in the
world. I will do anything that you can ask."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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