"The rest of the task was lighter for the moment; I had but to close the
door, and secure it slightly. I left the proper fastening up till a
future time, and I'll tell you that now--the fastening up took place at
the time when you were working shudderingly in the dark, taking in cans
of spirit, and pouring them gurgling and echoing into the bath; and I
heard all this, and the final screwing down of the lid and screwing up
of your door. I tell you I heard it all, boy, and still worked on in
your service."
"In my service?" said Stratton blankly.
"Yes. Why did I do all this? Did I not know that, in spite of all your
scheming and precautions, sooner or later the discovery must be made.
Was I to let you live on with that horror waiting always at your elbow,
driving you mad with dread, as I felt it was bound to do? It was for
your sake, boy, that I fought as I did, and brought your victim out
here."
"But tell me--what did you mean to do?"
"How can I, when my own ideas were all vague and strange, as I sat there
that night with this,"--he tapped his water-pipe--"and tried to hit on
some plan; and somehow the horror passed away, and I felt no fear of the
poor wretch lying there before me. I wondered at myself--that I could
sit there so calmly smoking, in the face of all that had passed; but I
did, for I said to myself, `What is death, after all, but sleep?'
"So I sat and thought, much as a man would under the circumstances--much
as you did--and I felt that I had done right in this my first step
toward saving you from the pain and suffering that was sure to come; for
I had no doubt of the discovery. Then I argued that such a wretch was
worthless, and that, even dead, he ought not to have the power to injure
two people whom I loved. I knew that you meant to hide your--"
"Crime," interposed Stratton.
"I never looked upon it as a crime. Let us call it your misfortune in
slaying another in the effort to save your own life. There, then, was
my position. I had gone so far; and, difficult as the task had seemed,
the task was easy beside that which was to come."
"Tell me what you did," said Stratton hoarsely.
"I tell you I sat down to think," said Brettison coolly, "and the more I
thought the more impossible the task seemed to grow. I told myself that
it must be done--that body must be concealed where no prying eyes could
find it, and so that he who hid it could never be forced to bear the
blame.
"If the poor wretch were discovered, it did not matter, thought I--no
one would know him. Even if it was found who he was, it did not matter;
for, I tell you, I felt no compunction, and I told myself that in time
you would get over the shock and might be happy after all; for I said
that you would have no greater cause for self-reproach than the soldier
who slays an enemy to save his own life.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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