I was shocked into something like a cataleptic state, and sat dazed for
a while. Either this or the strong cigar, or something, so affected me
that, as he passed the flask to me for the fourth time, the smoking
compartment seemed to swim about me as the train rolled thunderously
onward through the night. To steady myself I gazed fixedly at my
extraordinary fellow traveler as he sat, his now well-nigh empty bottle
before him, peering into it from time to time as if for some potent
servant of his own. Suddenly he leaned back and laughed more
diabolically than ever.
"Ha, ha, ha!" he roared. "You ought to have been with us last night in
his library! Aldrich and Depew and some of the others were there, and we
were checking over our list of sure votes in the House. The old man had
the grip, as I said a while ago, and privately, I'll state I think he's
scared stiff; for every fifteen minutes we got a bulletin from his
doctors and messages from him to rush S. F. 41144 to its passage,
regardless, or he'd accept a bid he'd got for the Bottle Imp from Sir
Thomas Lipton, who wants it for some crazy scheme regarding lifting the
Cup. All the while, there stood the Bottle with the Imp in it. When the
grip news was coming in there was nothing doing with his Impship. But
whenever we began discussing his transfer to the Company, the way
business picked up in that bottle was a caution! Why, you could hear
him stabbing the stopper with his tail, and grinding his horns against
the sides of the bottle, and fighting like a weasel in a trap, in such a
rage that the Bottle glowed like a red-hot iron. It was shameful! One of
the lawyers took the horrors, and had to be taken home in a
carriage--threw a conniption fit every block! Ha, ha, ha! Ha, ha, ha!
Oh! it was great stuff!"
"I don't see--" I began.
"No? Don't you?" he queried, between the satanic chuckles. "Well, by
George, the Imp saw, all right! He saw that modern financial ingenuity
has found a way to flimflam the devil himself. He saw, Sir (here his
voice assumed an oratorical orotund, and the capital S came in again),
that our corporation lawyers have found a spoon long enough so that we
can safely sup with Satan! Why, let me ask you once, what did the Imp go
into the Bottle deal for in the first place? To get the aforesaid soul.
You can see how he'd feel, now that the price is down to the last notch
but one, to have it sold to a corporation, with no more soul than a
rabbit! If--that--don't beat the--the devil, what does?"
It all dawned upon me now. The reasonableness of the entire story
appealed to me. I reached for the paper. There it was: "Federal Imp
Company: Charter powers very broad, taking in almost the entire field of
business." I looked at the lobbyist. He had dropped asleep with his head
on the table beside the empty cocktail bottle. Again things seemed to
swim, and I lapsed into a state of something like coma, from which I was
aroused by some one shaking me by the shoulder.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account