Yorksher Puddin': A Collection of the Most Popular Dialect Stories from the Pen of John HartleyHartley, John
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Yorksher Puddin': A Collection of the Most Popular Dialect Stories from the Pen of John Hartley
Hartley, John
English language -- Dialects -- England -- Yorkshire; Yorkshire (England) -- Fiction
But th' noise aghtslde gate laader, an th' wimmen's voices wor raised
to th' screamin' pitch, soa aw ventured to luk aght, an' thear wor poor
Dorothy ith middle ov a duzzen wimmen 'at wor shakkin ther umbrellas an
tooastin forks ovver her heead, wol one on em wor holdin' up mi Sundy
shirt, an other two wor tryin' to divide mi breeches between 'em, an
ther wor sich a hullaballoo as yo nivver heeard. 'Tha's war nor him bi
th' hawf!' sed one. 'What business as shoo wi his dooas under her arm,
aw should like to know. It's a disgrace to ivvery woman ith fold, that's
what it is!' sed another; an aw began to see 'at that cock had been th'
meeans o' gettin' her into trouble as well as me.
Aw thowt th' best thing aw could do wor to leeave 'em to settle it
amang thersen, soa aw went an gate weshed an donned, an it seems bi th'
time aw wor ready to goa aght they'd managed to get hold oth reight end
oth tale, an aw wor met wi a shaat o' laffin throo th' men, an even th'
wimmen smiled, tho' some on 'em shook ther heeads in a mysterious sooart
ov a way, as mich as to gie me to understand 'at they'd let me off that
once, but if awd onny desire to keep ther gooid opinion awd better net
get into another scrape oth same sooart. Aw knew they threw a gooid deal
o' blame onto poor Dorothy, an aw wor varry sooary it wor soa, for shoo
wor a nice quiet young woman, an tewed hard to keep hersen respectable,
an noabdy hed a word to say agean her, nobbut shoo kept a tom-cat 'at
worn't partiklar whooas dish he put his nooas in.
Aw nivver went near them hens agean wol Mundy mornin'. Aw knew they wor
in a land flowing wi broth an breead, but ther wor noa fear on me
forgettin' 'em, for that cock crowed wol he wor hooarse. Ther wornt one
chap i' that fold 'at worn't up i' time for his wark o' Mundy mornin',
an as for misen awd hardly a wink o' sleep all th' neet.
Aw wor foorced to stop in all th' day o' Sundy, becoss o' mi clooas
bein' at Dorothy's, an when Mundy coom aw went daan ith cellar an cut'
em all their heeads off, an detarmined to cook 'em all three an invite
th' wimmen to ther drinkin', an see if aw couldn't mak things pleasant
ageean. Aw saw a nay bar hingin' up some clooas, soa aw tell'd her what
aw intended to do, an awd noa need to mention it to onnybody else, for
th' news hed flown to ivvery haase i' less nor five minnits.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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