Yorksher Puddin': A Collection of the Most Popular Dialect Stories from the Pen of John HartleyHartley, John
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Yorksher Puddin': A Collection of the Most Popular Dialect Stories from the Pen of John Hartley
Hartley, John
English language -- Dialects -- England -- Yorkshire; Yorkshire (England) -- Fiction
'If the 8th of June is a rainy day, it foretells a wet harvest, so men
say,' but whether it does or it doesn't aw cannot tell: if it does we
mun mak th' best on it, that's all; but we've one bit o' comfort left
even then, for its sure to be fair at Halifax o'th' 24th. It's grand to
goa to th' Fair an' see fowk starin at th' pictures; an' its cappin to
harken to th' show fowk shaatin an' bawlin an' tellin all sooarts o'
tales to draw th' brass aght o' yor pockets. Then ther's th' swingin
booats, them's for cooarters: they're a grand institution for young
fowk, for if a chap can get his young woman to get in, he's sure of a
chonce to get his arm raand her waist, an' give her a bit of a squeeze.
Then ther's th' flyin' horses, whear a chap can get made mazy for a
penny: wheniver aw see 'em they allus remind me ov a chap aw knew; he
stood abaat six foot two in his stockin feet, an' weighed abaat six
stooan an' a hauf; an' one day he'd been poorly a bit, soa he thowt he'd
ax a friend 'at had a donkey if he'd lend it him. 'Tha can have it an'
welcome,' th' chap said, 'but aw'm feeard thi legs is too long.' 'Oh
ne'er heed that,' he sed, 'if aw find 'em to trail aw'l hold 'em up.'
Soa he gate it, an as he wor varry leet they went on nicely for a bit,
but just as he wor comin on Charlestaan, a chap stopt him to ax him what
they called that old church, soa he dropt daan his feet on to'th floor
and began to explain an' as sooin as he'd done that, th' donkey walked
away leavin him thear striddlin like a clooas peg. As sooin as he'd
finished he sed 'gie up!' an he thowt o' sittin daan; an' he did, but it
wor soa mich lower daan wol he thowt his back wor brokken; when he luk'd
raand he saw Neddy trottin up th' Haley Hill. 'Tha's tow't me a lesson,'
he sed, 'an' for th' futur, as long as iver aw can do for misen, aw'l
niver seek onybody's ass istance.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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