Yorkshire Oddities, Incidents, and Strange EventsBaring-Gould, S. (Sabine)
History
Yorkshire Oddities, Incidents, and Strange Events
Baring-Gould, S. (Sabine)
Legends -- England -- Yorkshire; Yorkshire (England) -- Miscellanea
"'Win't thee look out o' chamber window and see if there's a leet i' t'
school?' said I. So my owd woman went upstairs and looked, and when shoo
came doun, 'No, there ain't,' said she.
"'I thowt not,' said I.
"Well, we sat by t' fire some while, and then my owd lass went into back
kitchen to get a bit o' supper ready. Shoo hadn't been there long afore
shoo come back and said, 'James, lad!'
"'Ah!' says I; 'what's up?'
"'Why, this,' says she; 'there's summun i' t' back yard.'
"'How dost a' know?' says I.
"Says she, 'I heard 'em taukin'; and there's a lanthorn there.'
"'There's impidence!' says I. 'Who is they?'
"'I think Rachel Anne is one,' says Phoebe.
"'And Jim Greenwood is t' other,' says I; 'and I'm glad on't.'
"'Why?' says Phoebe.
"'Lass,' says I, 'I'll pay yond chap out, I will. I'll go out by t'
front door, and I'll come on him, and I'll let him know what I think of
him, coming arter our Rachel Anne. And when I've gotten howd on him,
I'll hollow. Then do thou run out o' t' back door, and I'll howd him
tight, and thou can poise him behind as much as thou like. Since we've
been man and wife these fourteen year,' says I, 'we've taken our
pleasure in common,' says I. 'We've been to Hollingworth Lake together,'
says I. 'And we've been to Southport together,' says I. 'And wunce we've
went together to t' exhibition i' Wakefield together. So,' says I,
'we'll ha' the kicking, and the shuttling, and the rumpling up o' yond
lad o' Greenwood's together. O glory!' And then I run out o' t' front
door as wick as a scoprill,[15] and came shirking round towards t' back
door i' t' yard. Well, t' night were dark, but I could see there were
some folks there, and I could see the glint o' a lanthorn, and t' leet
from t' back kitchen window came on a bit o' gownd, and I know'd it
belonged to Rachel Anne.
"'Drat him!' said I to mysen, 'what is lasses coming to next, when they
brings their young men under the noses o' their parents wot can't abear
them?'
"So I came sloping up along the wall till I was quite near. Will you
believe it?--her young man, that's owd Greenwood's lad Jim, was sitting
as easy as owt i' a chair.
"'Oh, you charmer!' says Rachel Anne. I heard her voice. I know'd it
were she. 'You're near perfect noo!'
"'Oh lawk!' thinks I, 'there's no accounting for tastes.' Jim he ain't
ower much o' a beauty, I promise thee. He's gotten a cast i' one o' his
eyes, and when he washes his face he's gotten a black stock on; and when
he don't, why, then he's all o' a muck, face and neck alike.
"'Can I get thee owt?' says Rachel Anne, as shameless as owt. 'Ah! tha
wants a pair o' boots. I reckon father's gotten an owd pair he win't
miss. I'll get them for thee.' Then sudden, as she was going away to t'
back door, she turns and says, 'My! he ain't got no pipe. I mun get him
one o' father's.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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