Yorkshire Oddities, Incidents, and Strange EventsBaring-Gould, S. (Sabine)
History
Yorkshire Oddities, Incidents, and Strange Events
Baring-Gould, S. (Sabine)
Legends -- England -- Yorkshire; Yorkshire (England) -- Miscellanea
St. Mary's Abbey belonged to the severe Cistercian Order. Complete
silence was one of the rules of the society. Except on Easter day, no
monk might speak; on Easter day every one talked, and nobody listened.
When Brother Jucundus accordingly appeared in the cloisters, no monk
turned to look at him, or asked him "how the saints he had come there?"
but swept by him like a ghost. Jucundus made himself as much at home as
was possible. He took his place at table, ate and drank what was set
before him, occupied a pallet in the common dormitory, lifted his voice
in concert with the others in the Abbey choir, and nobody meddled with
him. The monks, if they thought about him at all--and it was against
their rules to think of anything but their own spiritual
affairs--thought he was a new monk just joined in the usual accepted
manner.
A twelvemonth passed. It had been dull in St. Leonard's; it was duller
in St. Mary's. The day came round on which York fair was held, the day,
that happy day, which had ended so dolorously.
Now the day before York fair the office of cellarer fell vacant in St.
Mary's Abbey by the death of the monk who had presided over the wine and
beer. The Abbot by a happy inspiration committed the keys to Brother
Jucundus. Here was an opportunity! If York fair might not be enjoyed in
the market-place and the Pavement, he would at least commemorate it in
the Abbey cellar.
On York fair day, accordingly, Brother Jucundus, after having seen all
his fellow monks safe in bed, stole down the stone steps into the vault
where were the barrels, with a tankard in his one hand and a lantern in
the other.
St. Mary's Abbey was often called upon to receive noble, even royal
guests, and entertain them nobly and royally. It therefore contained
barrels of very prime wine and very strong audit ale. Brother Jucundus
went along the range of barrels trying one tipple after another. There
is nothing so dangerous as mixing your drink, and this the reverend
brother discovered at last, for he sat down, unable to proceed further,
by the best cask of Malmsey, and turning the tap, filled his tankard.
Next day at noon the Cistercians assembled in the refectory for their
frugal repast, dinner and breakfast in one: and as they had been up
since midnight, and had eaten and drunk nothing for twelve hours, were
tolerably hungry and dry. But the mugs were empty. At the Abbot's table
even was neither wine nor beer. The silent fraternity bore with this
some time, but at last even the rules of the Order could not keep them
perfectly silent. They shuffled with their feet, growled and grunted
discontentedly. At last the Abbot, in a voice of thunder, shouted--
"I want my beer!" and the example of the head becoming infectious,
"Beer, beer, beer! we all want our beer!" resounded from every part of
the refectory.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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