You no longer count (Tu n'es plus rien!)Boylesve, René
General
You no longer count (Tu n'es plus rien!)
Boylesve, René
World War, 1914-1918 -- Fiction
"Doesn't he grow handsome? And yet the dear fellow is overworking. It
isn't a sinecure, I assure you, his position at General Headquarters!
But I feel sure that I amuse him; I divert him from his worries. Without
flattering myself I please him, these days. And I love him, Oh, how I
love him!"
"You are two lucky people."
"Forgive me, dear Odette, I am almost ashamed to dwell upon my happiness
before you. But you are the only person who understands; you, who have
truly loved."
"Who love still, Clotilde."
Clotilde opened her eyes wide, thinking that she had not heard aright.
She knew what love was, surely, but it was difficult for her to admit
that after two years and a half one could love a dead man, as she loved
her strong and handsome husband. Yet she certainly could entertain no
suspicion concerning Odette, and she at once resolved to make the most
of her friend's enduring sentiments to talk to her about her own
personal love. She overwhelmed her with it as with a flood. Her love had
reached an intensity which it had never known in times of peace. The
seclusion which she had chosen in order to avoid hearing any talk of war
had built around her an ivory tower; and no longer meeting any one but
her husband, her pleasures ministered to only by him, she had found him
taking a place of unusual importance in her life; in himself he embodied
all the delights of which the war had deprived her, and which she had
learned to forget.
Odette herself began to speak of love. The subject was painful to her,
and yet she enjoyed it. Clotilde was the only creature with whom, since
the war, she had been able to converse on the subject without
diffidence. Letting herself go along the lines of her memories and her
habitual reveries, she began to taste the joy of a prisoner shut up in
a dark cell, who finds an opportunity to mention the brook that flows
through the sun-bathed field below his father's house.
"After all," she concluded, "the things that we have been saying, if
they could be noted down, would interest the world more, fifty or a
hundred years hence, than all the terrible events that are taking
place."
Clotilde would hear nothing about "terrible events." Love alone was
worth considering.
"We meet love everywhere," said Odette. "I find it springing up under my
feet wherever I go; in the operating-room, at the bedside of the wounded
and the dying. The towns nearest to the front are fuller of it than any
others, it would seem. They say that it has never caused such a stir."
"It represents life, which must be perpetuated, whatever happens. In
your case, my dear Odette, love is joined to death, but in general, no;
it severs itself from death. Those of our day who sing of love and
practise it are more surely serving the future than those who conceive
of restraint as the sole virtue."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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