Young Earnest: The Romance of a Bad Start in LifeCannan, Gilbert
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Young Earnest: The Romance of a Bad Start in Life
Cannan, Gilbert
English fiction -- 20th century
"A--a--ah! If we could stay like this forever and ever, in this quiet,
lovely place filled with nothing but us two! If we could stay!"
He thought of Kurt, and his mania for moving on.
She said:
"René! What do you like best in the world? I should like to give it
you."
He answered:
"Peace."
"Peace? Isn't this peace?"
Anger stirred in him on that. How could she talk of peace when to him
every moment throbbed with menace? He turned over on his side away
from her.
"Can there ever be peace," he asked, "between a man and a woman?"
"What do you mean?"
He made no reply.
"Ren! What do you mean? You sounded almost angry. Oh, I know what you
mean." And she dodged aside into phrases--the war of the sexes, the
difficulty of adjustment between the masculine-feminine and the
feminine-masculine. He was thinking of himself and her, she of
abstract entities between whom there was an hypothetical bottomless
difference. She guessed that he might be bored with love-making and
the honey-dew of desire, and set herself to be interesting to keep him
amused. She succeeded, but not without exasperating him a little.
"I meant you and me," he said, biting out his words.
"Us? Oh, you dear silly! There never was anything so wonderful as us.
We couldn't be more wonderful. Could we?"
"I dunno. But as I sit here, Lin, I can't help thinking of those
damned Smallmans. They must have sat here and they must have said:
'How wonderful we are!'"
That seemed to strike home to her, to hurt her, for she cried out and
jumped to her feet.
"Oh, I never thought----"
She moved quickly away and stood on top of a little hill against the
sky, the wind driving back her skirts and sending them ballooning out
behind her. He came up to her.
"What did you never think?"
"That on our second day you would be satirical."
He did not know the exact meaning of the word, took it to mean the
saying of what you do not precisely intend. He protested:
"I said what I felt. Mayn't I do that? I didn't think it would hurt
you, really, I didn't. Linda, I----
"Oh, you have such a heavy, stodgy mind. You always mean much more
than you can say. And you don't know how uncomfortable it is."
She had always been able to make him, in flashes, interested in
himself. Now her words came on him in faint illumination. He stood
pondering it.
"I can't help it," he said slowly, "I'm made like that. I can't be
comfortable."
Her answer seemed to him to clinch the hostility between them, to
bring it, to his intense relief, out into the open.
"I know you can't," she said, "but I can, and you mustn't spoil it for
me."
He was so grateful to her for this relief that he caught hold of her
and cried:
"Oh, Linda, if I thought I had spoiled your happiness, I would----"
"What would you do?"
"I don't know. But I would move heaven and earth to give it back to
you."
"I believe you would, and that makes me love you."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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