How much I was affected yesterday afternoon. I went, after I had done writing, to Sir Charles’s chamber, I opened the door softly, but instead of Charles, saw Lady Grandison and Emilia, both kneeling at the bed-side; I stole away unperceived to seek for Charles, I could not find him in any of the chambers, no one knew where he was. Oh! said I to myself, where is my dear Charles? I ran into the garden, and there I found him in the summer-house; he was kneeling down, his hands and eyes were lifted up to heaven, and big tears rolled down his cheeks; I heard him pray with earnestness, but could only distinguish a few words. _Preserve, oh! my God, my dear, my affectionate father—grant him longer life, Thou knowest best, Thou art infinitely merciful, oh! pardon me, I wish to die to save him, to save my mother from the anguish she must endure if deprived of him._ He seemed in an agony, and at length arose with more apparent firmness; I could no longer be silent, I caught his hand, God will preserve your father, I exclaimed; I hope so, answered he, but let us walk round the garden, that my mother may not see that I have been crying, it would add to her sorrows. We walked backwards and forwards, when Charles resumed the discourse; You heard me pray then? WILLIAM. No, I only heard a few incoherent words, and that you wished to die, to save your father. CHARLES. Of how much more consequence is his life than mine? I scarcely know how I should live without him. My wish was a selfish one, for perfect happiness is not to be found on earth; I have heard him often say, the happiest have their troubles, and the best their failings, which disturb their earthly peace. WILLIAM. What a comfort would these sensible reflections afford, should you lose your father? CHARLES. I hope they would; though it now appears to me, that nothing could afford me comfort, should I be deprived of the best of fathers. Come, let us go in; I would not lose the few moments that still afford me an opportunity of shewing my affection and alleviating his sufferings.