Nobody had meant any harm, but the fact that the two children were both
gone, and one, a girl like Lilias, wandering by herself no one knew
where, was as bad as if they had meant it a hundred times over. Who
could it be who had beguiled her with this story of Nello’s trouble? If
John, who had suffered so much, and who had come from the country where
feuds and vengeance still flourish, suspected an enemy in it, suspected
even his brother who had never been his friend, who could wonder? They
telegraphed to Randolph, and to Mr. Swan, and to the stations on the
way, John himself hurrying to Pennington to do so. And then when all
this was done, which made an exciting bustle for a moment, there was
nothing further possible but to wait till evening for the train. Such
pauses are due to the very speed and superior possibilities of modern
life. A post-chaise was slower than the railway, but it could be had at
once, and those long and dreary hours of delay, of time which one feels
to be lost, and in which, while we wait, anything fatal may happen, are
the reverse side of the medal, the attendant disadvantage upon headlong
speed and annihilation of distance. What a miserable house it was during
all that eternal day! Anxieties of every kind filled their minds--those
which concerned life and the living coming uppermost and shutting out
the solemn interest of the chamber over which death had been hovering.
The Squire slept, but only his nurse, unmoved in professional calm,
watched over him; and when he woke, still wrapped in a mist and haze of
half-consciousness which subdued all his being, yet with an aspect less
deathlike, Mary came and went to and from his room, in an enforced
stillness almost beyond bearing, not daring to stay long in one place
lest she should betray herself. She dared not allow herself to think of
little Lilias, perhaps in evil hands, perhaps wandering alone. Her
little Lily! Mary felt it would be impossible to sit still, impossible
to endure at all if she did not thrust away this thought. A little
woman-child, at that tender age, too young for self-protection, too old
for absolute impunity from harm. Mary clasped her hands tightly together
and forced her thoughts into another channel. There was no lack indeed
of other channels for her anxieties; her father thus lying between life
and death, and her brother with all the penalties of old on his head,
going and coming without concealment, without even an attempt to
disguise himself. It would have been better even for John, Mary felt
instinctively, if the Squire had been visibly dying instead of rallying.
What if he should wake again to full consciousness, and order the doors
of his house to be closed against his son as he had done before? What
if, seeing this, and seeing him there without attempt at concealment,
rejected by his own family, the old prosecution should be revived and
John taken? After that--But Mary shuddered and dropped this thread of
thought also.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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