Your Child: Today and Tomorrow: Some Problems for Parents Concerning Punishment, Reasoning, Lies, Ideals and Ambitions, Fear, Work and Play, Imagination, Social Activities, Obedience, Adolescence, Will, HeredityGruenberg, Sidonie Matsner
Science
Your Child: Today and Tomorrow: Some Problems for Parents Concerning Punishment, Reasoning, Lies, Ideals and Ambitions, Fear, Work and Play, Imagination, Social Activities, Obedience, Adolescence, Will, Heredity
Gruenberg, Sidonie Matsner
Children
We have been told over and over again that the instincts of
childhood are all for activity, and a few of us have trained
ourselves not to expect the children to _be still_ all the
time. Of course, there are times when we simply must have them be
still, and, of course, we allow the teachers to insist upon the
children being still in school. But we recognize that they must play
and romp and run and shout, and we are willing even to spend public
funds for playgrounds. This shows that we can learn, and that we can
make use of our knowledge. It is necessary only that we extend our
knowledge of the instincts of our children just as fast as we can
make use of more.
Up to the age of about ten, boys are apparently satisfied to play
games by themselves, or to play with others in ways that let each
look out pretty much for himself. At this age, however, a change
begins to appear. Now the boy tends to associate himself with others
of the same age, and before you know it your son "belongs" to some
"gang." Every street in a town and every corner in a city has its
gang. And if your boy has red blood and hard grit in him, he is a
member of one of these gangs. He can't help it. He does not join
because it is the fashion, or because he is afraid to keep out, or
because he has social ambitions. He joins because it is his instinct
to join with others in carrying on the activities to which other
instincts drive him. If you stand in the way of the gang, you are
fighting against one of the strongest forces in human nature.
Now if you feel the way Mrs. Brown and Mrs. Green felt about the
gangs, I do not blame you. But you must not stop there. Let's try to
find out first what the gang means to the boys and what it means to
the race. When a boy joins a gang, he does not discard his instinct
for play or for running and shouting. He simply takes on a new
relation to the world about him. As a member of the gang, he still
runs and plays and shouts; but now he has become conscious of his
place in the world, and that place is with his fellow-members,
surrounded by all sorts of enemies and dangers and obstacles to his
well-being. In his gang he finds comfort and support for his
struggle with the outside world. Here he finds opportunity for
satisfying exchange of thought; here he finds sympathy and
understanding such as he can get nowhere else.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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